Not So Plain Jane

January readings

2012-01-01T08:23:00.000-08:00

I didn't read NEARLY as much as I wish I had this month. I'd like to be reading at least 6-8 books a month. But it is what it is. So here goes!

Between Sundays by Karen Kingsbury. Kingsbury is a Christian author. And one I had never read anything by before. The story was beautifully written and very tear-jerking. Cory is an 8 year old boy who was told by his dying mother that the famous 49ers quarterback Aaron Hill is his father. His foster mother, who was his mother's best friend, doesn't believe that. But Cory is eventually given an opportunity to write Aaron a letter. Aaron's world is turned upside down and he turns to his back-up quarterback, a strong Christian and family oriented man named Derrick. The story that follows had me in tears most of the time, it was so beautiful. What it all boils down to is that faith in God can make the impossible possible. And life (for Christians and for football players) is about what happens between Sundays.

Bad Girls Don't Die by Katie Alender. All I will say is holy crap! Alexis' 13 year old little sister Kasey is a bit doll obsessed. Which seems only slightly odd. Until her eyes change colors, weird things start happening at their house, and one of Alexis' classmates, Megan, tells her that Kasey is possessed. Megan and Alexis team up to help free Kasey from the powerful force that has taken over her soul. The spirit of a vindictive little girl. This book was crazy. good. Crazy good!

Mr. Darcy's Daughters by Elizabeth Aston. Elizabeth and Darcy have gone to Constantinople (if you've a date there, she'll be waiting in Istanbul btw). Their 5 daughters, Letitia, Camilla, twins Georgina and Belle, and Alethea, are left with their cousins in London. Letitia is very prim and proper. Camilla is outspoken and well-read, just like her mother. The twins are spitting images of their aunt Lydia, even down to their impulsiveness and willingness to elope. And Alethea is her father's daughter. Just like the Bennett girls in Pride and Prejudice, the Darcy girls have their own sets of adventures and misadventures, but even more so as the Darcy girls are heiresses. This is a must for any English majors/literature lovers. Jane Austen would have been proud of this novel!

The True and Outstanding Adventures of the Hunt Sisters by Elisabeth Robinson. This was my book club book. And a total tearjerker! Olivia Hunt, a movie producer, writes a series of letters throughout a one year period of her life. Those letters are to her sister, her brother, her best friend, her former boyfriend, other Hollywood players, doctors, you name it. The letters chronicle her sister's diagnosis with leukemia, her own attempt to produce Don Quixote (a story of a man who attempted to live an impossible dream, which is kind of foreshadowing), her loves and her struggles. And through it all, she manages to recount the true and outstanding adventures of the Hunt sisters. I will say this- if you have a family member with cancer, it's going to be a tough read. I can attest to that. And then to find that this is almost a true story. The author lost her sister to cancer and held on to the letters that the two of them had written to each other. So it was clearly a cathartic process for her, you can definitely feel the love the older sister has for her younger sister.

Bye bye 2011- it was fun reading!

2012-01-01T07:35:00.001-08:00

I'm sad to announce that I didn't end the year with a lot of books having been read this month. Only 8 (and 3 of them were shirt stories so I'm not even sure those count!). But here we go with the list!

Anthem by Ayn Rand. This was a re-read. But I'm not sure that a book I read in middle school (or maybe early high school) should really count as a re-read. It had been so long that I didn't really remember much about it. So I enjoyed the re-read. It's an interesting look at individualism v. socialism, advancement v. control. In a distant future, and another dark age, Equality 7-2521 doesn't fit in. Society calls for the "we" to prevail. He begins to sneak away and gain knowledge from hidden books. He falls in love with Liberty 5-3000, an emotion that is not allowed. When he finally decides to share his knowledge with the scholars, they attack him. He leaves the city and finds himself in the uncharted forest. Liberty 5-3000 (or the Golden One, as he calls her) joins him and they look for a new life. They find a city from the Unmentionable Times and make that their home. While reading, Equality discovers the Unspeakable Word and realizes that humanity is an "I," not a "we." He renames himself Prometheus, because he attempted to bring electricity to the scholars and renames Liberty Gaea, because she will be the mother of a new people. It's an easy read and a rather interesting look at how socialism destroys the individual and it is up to each man to retain his individuality, or his EGO.

Hotel at the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford. If you are in a book club, this needs to be on your list!! This story takes place in the 1940's and 1986. In the beginning, twelve year olds Henry (Chinese-American) and Keiko (Japanese-American) becomes friends in Seattle. When her family is sent to a Japanese internment camp thanks to the war, they are forced apart. And begin to realize how much they mean to each other. Eventually, they both move on and lose contact with each other. Over 40 years later, The Panama Hotel, entryway to the former Japantown in Seattle, is bought and refurbishing begins. Henry, who is now a widower, and his son find items left there by Japanese families upon their evacuation. Henry uncovers memories of Keiko. And wonders what ever became of her. It was a beautiful story, one I didn't want to end!

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll. I know I've seen about a million versions of this movie and assumed I'd read the books. But half-way through the first book, I realized I never had read either. I loved reading everything about Wonderland. Namely because I love all the Alice movies that have been made (prequels, sequels, everything). So it was great to get to the bare bones of Alice.

Peter Pan by JM Barrie. Again, during the reading of this one, I realized I had never read it. Shocking! Just like with Alice, I love all things Pan. In fact, I just watched a movie on SyFy (most awful spelling of a channel ever) called Neverland. It was kind of a prequel to Peter Pan. Which is probably why I decided to read Peter Pan rather than something else. I'm really enjoying reading all of the old classics (whether they are re-reads or first time reads).

Mommy, Where Do Baby Unicorns Come From, The Ugly Kids, and The Ugly Kids: To Hell in a Hand Basket by Renee Adams. These were free short stories on iBooks when I started downloading stuff. Thought they sounded cute. Maybe young adult-esque. The first one is about a little girl who sees a unicorn outside her school. She asks her mom where baby unicorns come from. Seeing as her mother doesn't believe in unicorns, she can't give her an answer. But the little girl eventually does learn the answer. When an innocent dies, they become a unicorn. Kind of sad and almost gruesome, huh? The second is about a girl named Lily who is very tall and very big. A Goblin prince falls in love with her and decides to court her. She is able to become an honorary Goblin. But doesn't want to be courted by Gohber. Until she realizes his even more grotesque brothers would like to be courting her. In the third, Gohber's parents invite Lily to their Goblin kingdom for a celebration. But before the celebration can begin, Gohber's brother literally send Gohber to hell in a hand basket. And Lily has to go save him. Because she is an honorary Goblin after all!

I didn't participate in No Shave November, but rather No Book November!

2011-12-01T13:43:00.001-08:00

I think, after last month, I was a little burnt out on reading. So I didn't start a single book until the 6th. And other than the first four books, I just couldn't keep up the same pace as last month. So let's see how (not) well I did.

Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins. I have had people trying to get me to read these books for quite a while. No idea what took me so long. I read the first one on Sunday the 6th and the second on Monday the 7th. I just couldn't put them down! I did take a quick break to re-read my book club book (more on that later), but went immediately back for the third book as soon as I could. For those who haven't read them, the series is about a girl named Katniss. She lives in a future North America that has been ravaged by hunger and rebellion. To punish the rebellion, each year a boy and a girl from each of the 12 districts of the country are forced to compete in the Hunger Games, a battle royale of epic proportions. This year, Katniss and her co-tribute put a hitch in the plan. They are "star-crossed lovers.". Or are they? Their victory triggers the country and uprisings begin again. In a strange twist, Katniss and Peeta are sent back to the Games because it is a 25th "anniversary" year in the second book. The third book begins immediately after that year's Hunger Games, where Katniss has again made a fool of the Capital (the city that controls their country). The war for freedom has begun. While I was pleased with the outcome of the war, I was NOT pleased with the ending of the book. Katniss has two loves in the series. And she isn't actually given a choice- one leaves her and she "realizes" that she's always loved the one she ends up with. I did enjoy this series, but the first book was by far the best. Katniss' character seems to change throughout the series, and not in a good way. She is actually rather disappointing after her successes in the first book. But it is what it is. And I'm glad I've read the series. And I REALLY can't wait for the movie!!

The Paris Wife by Paula McLain. This was my book club book, and also a re-read for me. I loved it the first time and loved it again this time. It's the fictional story of Ernest Hemingway's first wife, Hadley. These types of books are some of my favorite, these historical fictions. The facts are true, the words between the characters are not always. Hadley was nearly 9 years older than Ernest when they met. After a short courtship, they married. And immediately moved to Paris. They traveled, they loved, they drank. They befriended amazing people- Gertrude Stein and her wife, Scott Fitzgerald and his wife, many other famous names. They did eventually have a son, nicknamed Bumby. And they finally divorced, after 6 years of marriage. The catalyst of their divorce, a divorce of two people who were madly in love with each other, was another woman. Isn't it always? But this time around, it was one of Hadley's best friends. While Ernest went on to marry three more times and have countless lovers before he shot himself, Hadley remarried only once. And stayed married for the rest of her life. I really enjoyed this book, as I had no idea anything about Hemingway's Paris wife. Even though she willingly left the public life behind when she and Ernest divorced, it seems like she was an amazing woman.

The Best of Me by Nicholas Sparks. I always tell myself I'm not going to read another Nicholas Sparks book because they are always pretty much the same. Young love, ripped apart because they aren't of the same social circle. Eventual rekindling of the relationship. And some sort of regret. And of course, death and sacrifice. I'll be the first to admit, I always get a little teary-eyed when I read a Nicholas Sparks book. And then wonder why in the world I keep reading the same story over and over again. Darn addictive Nicholas Sparks....

Horns by Joe Hill. I've had this book on my shelf to read for quite a long time. I'm not really sure why I decided to buy it. But I'm really glad that I did. It was great! A year after the brutal murder of his girlfriend (a crime he is accused of but never charged with), Ig wakes up with horns growing out of his head. Yes, solid bone horns growing out of his head. These horns seem to grant Ig a special power- people just confess their sins to him, tell him all the bad things they have ever done. And then forget that they have seen him. He decides to use this power to find the real killer. Because once he finds the monster who killed his beloved, there will be hell to pay. Quite literally. Because the hell he's been through since her murder has quite literally turned him into a devil who is bent in revenge. The concept of the book was ridiculously intriguing. I had a hard time putting it down. Two enthusiastic thumbs up!

Kitty Kitty by Michele Jaffe. I've read some of her other stuff before and didn't think it too horrible. I didn't realize that she apparently writes juvenile lit in addition to her adult lit. And I'm not sure I'm a big fan. I bought this book quite a while ago and now I'm wondering why. In this book, high school senior Jas is forced to move to Venice (yes Italy, so I'm not sure what she's bitching about) the day before her senior year of school begins (okay, maybe I understand the bitching a little bit). As it turned out, the story was pretty cool (Jas solves a murder and is nearly killed in the process). But the fact that it was juvenile lit just about killed me. And we are talking totally stereotypical juvenile lit.

Maybe I should have called this month Book-tober?!

2011-10-31T14:27:00.000-07:00

This month, my goal was two-fold. I didn't want to have as many re-reads as last month. And I wanted to complete the Oz series. Let's see if I was successful, shall we?

Sara Crewe and A Little Princess; being the whole story of Sara Crewe now told for the first time by Frances Hodgson Burnett. The first was like the Reader's Digest version of the second. This is the story of a pampered little girl who becomes a pauper when her father dies, leaving her penniless and alone in the world. She is allowed to remain at her boarding school, but must work as a maid. She is clever, with an active imagination. One day, all of her imaginings become her reality. And she truly becomes a little princess!

Lost in Time by Melissa de la Cruz. Technically the eighth book written about the Blue Bloods, but only the sixth that is actually story. Two of them give background on the Blue Bloods. These are a fabulous vampire series. In it, the vampires, or Blue Bloods, are born vampires. They live a cycle, then their blood "rests.". When they are ready, they can return and live another cycle. Because of this way of life, they are "born" with memories of all of their lives. And they were famous people in the past. The biggest addition to the vampire lore is that they are the Fallen Angels. Two of them actually chose to become Blue Bloods, in an attempt to save their brethren. In this series, the Blue Bloods are being killed (the true death, which means they can never come back in a new cycle). They realize that they are being attacked by the Silver Bloods, Blue Bloods who have turned on their own and drunk vampire blood (a grave offense). The characters are interesting (each Blue Blood has a twin, to whom they are bonded each cycle). Sometimes, things go wrong though. And bonds are broken. In this book, we learn some back stories. We descend into the seventh circle of Hell. And we try to find a way to stop the Silver Bloods. I really enjoyed it. Pissed that the last book doesn't come out until 2013 though. Dang long time to wait....

Rinkitink in Oz, The Lost Princess of Oz, The Tin Woodman of Oz, The Magic of Oz, and Glinda of Oz by L. Frank Baum. Book ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, and fourteen in the Oz series. The tenth book takes place in the island countries surrounding Oz. Prince Inga (whose family owns three magical pearls that will protect, give strength and impart wisdom) and King Rinkitink (and his talking goat Bilbil, who is actually an enchanted prince) are forced to rescue Inga's parents and the rest of his countrymen when they are taken prisoner. With the help of the Pearls (and Dorothy and the Wizard), they are victorious. They briefly go to Oz but eventually return to their island kingdom, happy and secure. In the eleventh book, Ozma and all of the magical items in Oz disappear one night. As Dorothy and her friends go in search of her, they learn that an evil magician is behind the disappearance. Once they find the magician, Dorothy turns him into a dove. He eventually repents of his bad deeds. And everyone in Oz is happy again! Book twelve gives us a little more background on the Tin Man. He was in love with a Munchkin girl when he back the Tin Man. In this story, he decides to track her down and marry her (because he'd promised to!). In addition to meeting new friends along the way, they have many adventures and eventually find Nimmie Amee (the Munchkin girl, who has married someone else by this time). In book thirteen, the wicked Nome King is back. He teams up with a young boy who has learned a magical word that can transform anyone into anything. The Nome King wants the animals of Oz to help him conquer Ozma. Unfortunately for him, good always conquers evil in Oz. He and the boy are transformed into nuts (no, seriously, a walnut and a hickory nut) by the Wizard. Then they drink from the Fountain of Oblivion and are allowed to stay in the Emerald City forever. In book fourteen (the last official Oz book written by Baum), Dorothy reads Glinda's Book of Records and discovers two groups of Ozma's subjects (the Flatheads and the Skeeters) are at war. Ozma and Dorothy then go to find these subjects. When they end up in trouble, Ozma's advisers- the Wizard, Glinda, the Tin Man, the Scarecrow, basically the whole cast of characters we've met up til now- come to their aid.

The First Husband by Laura Dave. I really liked this book, from start to finish. Actually, start to finish it only took me a day! It's a very easy read. It's about a woman who's boyfriend of five years decides he needs to learn who he is. Without her. So what does she do? She meets someone else and, within six months, has married him and moved from LA to western Massachusetts. Of course, the ex decides he wants her back. And she loses her job as a travel writer, only to get offered a better job. Along the way, she finally learns who she is and what she wanted all along.

Candide by Voltaire. I decided to go old school, y'all. Like 1759 old. At first, I thought I had read this book before. Then realized it seemed familiar because I know the music from the play. Yep- a nerd through and through am I! I found myself singing the songs that went along with different scenes in the book. For a book written so long ago, it was a very easy read. Candide falls in love, loses his love (only to find her again), survives every adventure that comes his way (sometimes to the point of ridiculousness- no one could escape from death as often as he and his friends do) and through it all wonders if "all's for the best in this best of all possible worlds."

Always Something There to Remind Me by Beth Harbison. Definitely a good beach read. Even though I read it pool-side. In the 1980's, Erin and Nate fell in love. They were young and it was more intense than young love should be. But it ended over a misunderstanding. Fast-forward 23 years. Erin is now a single mom, about to be engaged to a wonderful man. But she never truly got over Nate. When she sees him again, they immediately fall into bed together, despite the fact that he is now married. To one of her best friends from high school. If given the choice, do you choose the man you never stopped loving or the man who is perfect on paper?

Cinderella. Yep, I went for a fairy tale. It's amazing what you can download from iBooks. I feel like everyone knows the story and has read it in a collection of fairy tales (or just seen the Disney version, which was all I'd ever done). So I thought maybe I should read it. It was just what I expected. And very sweet, just like a Disney movie should be.

The Story Girl and The Golden Road by LM Montgomery. Both of these were re-reads. They are about a family (focus on the children) who live on Prince Edward Island. It's Dan, Felicity and Cecily King (siblings). Their cousins Beverly and Felix King (brothers). Another cousin, Sara Stanley (the Story Girl). The hired boy, Peter Craig. And a neighbor, Sara Ray. They have good natured adventures in the years they are all living on the family farm. Typical LM Montgomery charm and appeal.

40 Love by Madeline Wickham, aka Sophie Kinsella. Honestly, I'm still not sure what this book was about. It was British chick lit, which is usually my go-to. This one was about several couples (and their children), spending a weekend in the country for a fun tennis weekend. There were money problems, adultery, confusing British terminology. All in all, not my favorite. And I typically love 1- British chick lit and 2- the author who wrote The Shopaholic series. How she managed to go so wrong, I have no idea.

Sister by Rosamund Lupton. In this book, Beatrice returns home to England from NYC when she learns that her 21 year old pregnant younger sister Tess has disappeared. When her sister's body is discovered, it is ruled to be a suicide based on her postpartum depression after giving birth to a stillborn boy. But Beatrice doesn't believe that her sister would have committed suicide. And she doesn't stop searching for her sister's murderer. The book skips around in time a lot in the beginning, which I didn't enjoy. But once I got used to the writing style, I really enjoyed the book. The murderer (and the ending itself) was unexpected and kept me on the edge of my seat until the very end of the book! This was Rosamund Lupton's first novel and I definitely thought she did a great job.

What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty. Alice Love wakes up from having hit her head at the gym. What's weird is that she doesn't go to the gym. At least, 29 year old and pregnant Alice doesn't go the the gym. 39 year old with 3 kids Alice does. Somehow Alice has lost 10 years of her life. She is now living a life that she doesn't even recognize because it was never the life she wanted. She is in the midst of a divorce from her formerly beloved husband and is almost estranged from her older sister. She realizes that 39 year old Alice is a bit of a bitch and she definitely doesn't like the woman she has become. When she does get her memory back, she has to figure out how to reconcile 29 year old Alice with 39 year old Alice. All I have to say is, thank goodness for the epilogue. It definitely gave me the ending I was hoping for!!

A semi-charmed kind of life

2011-10-22T09:31:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching The Lovely Bones, which is a movie based on a book I read quite a few years ago. Both the book and the movie are excellent (but somewhat disturbing, as it's about a 14 year old girl named Susie who is raped and murdered by a neighbor). One of the images that comes into play in the movie is Susie's charm bracelet. She was wearing it when she was murdered and the murderer keeps it as a trophy of sorts. I remember from the book that the charm bracelet was very important to Susie. It made me think about my charm bracelets. Yes, there is an "s" on the end of that. I have 2 charm bracelets. I don't wear them very often, but each charm holds a special meaning to me, just like they did to Susie. Some charms have more than one memory attached. Which makes them even more special.

The first bracelet has the most charms on it. It's actually completely full! The first charm is a worm with glasses sitting on a book. Yep- a bookworm. That's me! Next is a Celtic knot. I got to spend some time in Scotland in college and that reminds me of that time. A square that says "made in USA". Duh. A jack o'lantern. This has 2 meanings. I love Halloween. And my dad has always called me punkin. A Christmas tree. The bracelet itself was a Christmas gift and this charm was already attached. A lizard. This one, I'm not sure about. I think from all of our trips to the Bahamas, where the lizards are everywhere. A hand doing I love you in sign language. My parents and I have always done this to each other, especially if we are driving away. A clover, for all the fun St.Patty's Days down in 5 Points. A bottle of wine. Again, duh. Scales, which are both my astrological sign (Libra) and my job (scales of justice). A frog with a crown. Because sometimes you have to kiss some frogs to find a prince. A palm tree for our trips to the Bahamas. A shopping bag, although I don't like to shop as much as I used to. A beautiful cross, for my faith. A pair of tap shoes- I danced all while growing up. A baseball for my favorite sport. A flip-flop for my favorite shoes. A heart that says bridesmaid. I've been in a lot of weddings. An R for my last name. A treble clef- I played the piano and took voice lessons all throughout high school. A kitten- my parents and I have always had cats. A fish. Perhaps for snorkeling in the Bahamas? A fortune cookie. I love Chinese food! A sun hat for the Carolina Cup. 2002- the year I graduated from law school (my last graduation ever!!). A rabbit. One year for Easter, the Easter Bunny brought us real bunnies!! A sand dollar for family beach trips. A little devil- I thought it was cute! A cheerleader- all 4 years of high school and 1 year of college, thank you very much. A snowflake for the few times it snows here in SC. A pig for my goddog. I know, that sounds weird. But Pig is her nickname! A graduation cap- that one was for high school. A dolphin from when my parents and I went swimming with them. And a Confederate flag. Because I am a southern girl!!

The second bracelet has slightly less charms on it, but it's still got a lot of them! The first is a pair of handcuffs. I used to be a prosecutor and I dated a cop. Enough said. Next is the Empire State Building, to symbolize all of my trips to NYC throughout the years. A Gamecock, well, because I am a Gamecock fan. A Venetian punter's shirt from the last time I went to Vegas and stayed at the Venetian. Sadly, not because I've been to Venice. A lighthouse. Which reminds me of Cape Cod. Movie tickets- I LOVE going to the movies. A cranberry bogger- again to remind me of Cape Cod. A martini/cosmopolitan glass for many a girls night out. Sunglasses because I love to lay out. The Twin Towers. I remember going to the top of one of the Towers as a child. A sombrero for my love of Mexican food. A single rose. My high school boyfriend played soccer. During half time of one of the games, the guys got roses to give to their moms. Boyfriend ran up to give his to me! A flamingo. During one of our trips to the Bahamas, my parents and I got to see a rescue flamingo who didn't eat shrimp. So he was completely white! Amazing. An airplane because I love to travel. A crown- I am a princess after all! A horse. My parents and I went horseback riding on a beach in Texas. My horse decided to throw me. Amazingly, it didn't create a fear of horses and I've been horseback riding a few times since. A skier. Ive been skiing only a few times, but have always really liked it. I actually wish I could ski more often so I could be better at it. A bird talon- for the Gamecocks. And Chinese letters. I was fortunate enough to get to go to China a few years ago.

And those are my charms!

I got my read on in September!

2011-09-30T07:38:00.000-07:00

So apparently, I decided I needed to read a lot of books this month. And most of them were re-reads. Actually, the majority of them were. So here goes!

Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George. This is a Newberry Medal winning book. For those of you who don't know much about children's literature, that's a big stinking deal. I'm just saying. This book is about an Eskimo girl named Julie/Miyax. She is orphaned, and when her aunt dies, she agrees to marry a fellow Eskimo boy in order to go back to the village of her childhood. As they are both 13, it's merely a marriage in words, not deeds. Until Daniel, her husband, is teased by his schoolmates. Rather than be raped by her boy-husband, Miyax leaves and runs away toward San Fransisco to find her pen pal. Along the way, she becomes part of a wolf pack. She is torn between the old ways and the new ways and eventually must make a choice between the two.

Tik Tok of Oz and The Scarecrow of Oz by L. Frank Baum. Books eight and nine in the Oz series. I'm not really sure why some of these books have the names they have. Tik Tok wasn't the main character of the book, contrary to the title's implication. This one has the Nome King, who formerly tried to conquer Oz, ousted because he's such an evil man. We also have another little girl from our world who ends up in Oz. My favorite part? Toto, now living in Oz, can talk! Same goes for the ninth book- the Scarecrow doesn't come onto the scene until much later in the book. In this one, Cap'n Bill and Trot find their way to Oz from our world. Long story short- they have lots of adventures in a whole new part of Oz and eventually come to live in the Emerald City with all of the favorite characters who live there!

Anne of Green Gables, Anne of Avonlea, Anne of the Island, Anne of Windy Poplars, Anne's House of Dreams, Anne of Ingleside, Rainbow Valley and Rilla of Ingleside by LM Montgomery. All of these (yep, the entire series is listed right here) were re-reads for me. I have been obsessed with Anne for as long as I can remember. Please refer to one of my prior blog entries about this obsession. Anyway, for those of you who have read the Anne of Green Gables series, you probably know how amazing these books are. For those of you who haven't read them, you are seriously missing out. SERIOUSLY. Anne's story begins in 1878, when Anne is 11 years old. The story ends with the end of World War 1. By the end of the series, Anne's children are more the focus. But Anne is still always present, always Anne. Throughout the years, Anne went from a desperate for love orphan to a beloved wife and mother. She became a teacher, she went to college, she became a principal, she married the love of her life (despite thinking she had fallen in love with her "ideal man"), she became "Mrs. Dr. Blythe," she gave birth to seven children (and sadly buried the first). She lost loved ones, made new friends, had new adventures and throughout it all, never seemed to lose her lust for life. Something she was able to pass on to her children. If only all of us had Anne's love of living. Maybe I need to rethink my life a little bit!

Chronicles of Avonlea and Further Chronicles of Avonlea by LM Montgomery. These are collections of short stories and yet another re-read for me. All of them take place in the Avonlea community and its surrounding towns. Some of them have Anne Shirley as a minor character. Some are from Anne's perspective. Some don't mention Anne at all. But all of them have that same wonderful Anne of Green Gables feeling that Montgomery does so well. The stories are quick and easy to read. Sweet without being saccharine. Feel good stories that you just want to read over and over again. I know this because I have read them over and over again.

Kilmeny of the Orchard by LM Montgomery. Yep- this month was clearly LM Montgomery month!! This is a beautiful love story about a young man who decides to help out a friend by teaching for him in a small town, and the lovely girl he loves. She is born unable to speak because her proud mother refused to speak and forgive her own father for hurtful words he said to her. A stain on her birth and a very proud family made her a girl who was a mystery to the town she grew up in. But this young man shows her what true love is. And eventually she is able to speak. Even though this story is very different than the Anne stories, there is something in the way Montgomery writes that is so appealing. She really might be my all-time favorite author!!

Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese. This was my book club book for the month. It's about the twin sons of a surgeon and a nun. Yes, I said nun. They are orphaned at birth by the death of their mother and the abandonment of their father. They are raised in a hospital in Ethiopia by the other two surgeons who had worked with their father. Originally inseparable, something happens that creates a distance between the brothers. Both become surgeons- one trained with a medical degree, the other not officially a doctor but a famous surgeon nonetheless. Eventually, circumstances bring the brothers back together and brings their father back into their lives. The book was long. And at first kind of difficult to get into. But eventually, I found the story to be amazing. Even though it was a work of fiction, some of the events actually did happen (although not in the same time and/or way the story described). Which was kind of cool to learn.

Forrest Gump by Winston Groom. It was not what I expected. The movie was drastically different from the book. The biggest difference? Forrest is a 6'6", 250+ pound machine! Tom Hanks is a good actor, but he's not THAT good. Forrest also had some other adventures that aren't in the movie (he was an astronaut, a chess grand master, a "rassler," and a Senatorial candidate) His mom doesn't really play much of a role in the book. Bubba was a football teammate from Alabama, in addition to being a war buddy. He doesn't save Lt. Dan's life (but they do join forces after the war). He and Jenny frequently live together throughout the time they know each other (and that does imply a sexual relationship). Jenny does have a son, who is Forrest's child, but she marries someone else and doesn't die of AIDS. None of these differences really bothered me. The only thing I truly didn't like? The book was written the same way Forrest speaks. No proper English here. Just good ole Southern talk. Which is very difficult to read!

It's the most wonderful time of the year

2011-09-27T17:41:00.000-07:00

Last week, we officially entered in my favorite season- fall. It's my favorite season for a myriad of reasons. I love the weather (well, not the current crap we are having, I mean the REAL fall weather). I love Halloween. I love Thanksgiving. I love my birthday (hint, hint- it's October 10. And I am a sucker for prezzies!!). But one of the things I love the most? The fall TV schedule!

This year, my TV schedule is pretty packed. It's filled with old favorites and some new ones as well. I've also already gotten rid of some new TV shows that kind of sucked. So here's what I'm watching (and a little personal opinion on how they are panning out).

First up is scripted shows- drama division.
1- Desperate Housewives. It's the final season, so I'm expecting big things from season. We've already got a murder and memories of what led Mary Alice to commit suicide. So it should be good stuff!
2- Pan Am. There's only been one show so far. But it seems pretty good. I read an article about the real Pan Am stewardesses. And they said that other than the exact shade of blue of the uniforms and the fact that their hair couldn't touch their shoulders, everything is pretty spot on. It kind of makes me wish I had lived back then and could have been a stewardess. Lord knows I wouldn't want to be one nowadays- people are rude and travel seems to have become a right rather than a privilege.
3- Gossip Girl. The first new episode was last night. I have read all of the Gossip Girl novels. They are a lot of fun. And the show is nothing like them anymore. Honestly, the show veered away from the books long ago. At first, it bothered me. Now I love the show so much that I don't care! And any show with Ed Westwick is a show I'm going to watch!!
4- Hart of Dixie. This is a new show starring the adorable Rachel Bilson. She's a cardiothorasic surgeon who moves to Alabama to get experience as a GP. It's cute. I'm going to give it another week before I decide if it's officially on my list of what to watch.
5- The Playboy Club. I decided to watch this because of the scandalous Eddie Cibrian. Turns out it's a pretty good show. Week one, we had a murder and a Bunny who is in a sham marriage in order for both she and her husband to hide their sexual preferences (which obviously aren't each other!).
6- Revenge. Omg! Best new show of the year for me!! It's already got intrigue enough to keep me interested for the whole season and we are only one episode in!
7- Grey's Anatomy. I'm so excited about this show returning this week and can't wait to see what's in store for Derek and Meredith this season.
8- American Horror Story. It hasn't started yet. So I know nothing about it. But it looks really good and I'm excited about it starting.

Next up- scripted shows- sitcom division
1- How I Met Your Mother. This is one of my favorite sitcoms of all time. My only complaint? Who is the mother?! Let us know already!
2- 2 Broke Girls. This is a new one. I liked it. But I didn't love it. So it could go. Or stay.
3- Glee. Enough said. It makes me GLEE-ful. I know, bad. But the show is so amazing!!
4- New Girl. It's my favorite new sitcom. It's cute. It's quirky. It's a winner.
5- Up All Night. It's on the chopping block. It's fun, but not great.
6- Suburgatory. First episode is tomorrow. Yay!!
7- Modern Family. Second favorite returning sitcom. Hysterically funny. Cameron and Tyler are my favorite characters. I am not a big fan of new Lily though....
8- Happy Endings. Okay, maybe this is my second favorite returning sitcom. I am so excited that it got picked up again. So funny!

Third up- reality shows
1- Sister Wives. I love me some polygamists. Yep- I said it. These polygamists are great fun. They have now moved to Vegas and are hoping to continue raising the 17 (or however many) kids in the Mormon religion. Heaven help them!!
2- Real Housewives of New Jersey. I think these Housewives are my favorites. No one can top Caroline Manzo as far as I am concerned. Teresa (and her disgusting husband) have officially gotten on my nerves though.
3- Kendra. Loved her on Girls Next Door. Love her as a wife and mom.
4- Dancing with the Stars. I LOVE this show. Every time I watch it, all I want to do is learn to ballroom dance. With Maks. Yum.
5- Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. These women are nut balls. But wow! Last year, I hated Camille Grammer. Don't mind her so much this year. It might be because I feel a little bit sorry for her after what her husband did to her. Or maybe because she's toned it down a bit. But either way, I'm glad she's on the show.
6- Gene Simmons Family Jewels. It starts back next week. With Shannon Tweed's answer to Gene's proposal. As the wedding is planned for next month, I'm going to assume the answer was yes.
7- Teen Mom. The show is over, except for the reunions. I have watched these girls (not the Teen Mom 2 girls though) since they were 16 and Pregnant. Still love Catelynn and Tyler. The only two who seem moderately mature, probably because of their decision to give their child up for adoption. Maci has gotten on my nerves. She is pressuring her boyfriend to marry her so she can have more children because, at 19, she's getting old. She's crazy. If Farrah were my child, I would smack the crap out of her. She is so disrespectful. And finally, Amber. She hits her boyfriend. Honestly, the only one of the babies that I don't feel sorry for is the one who was put up for adoption!
8- The Rachel Zoe Project. I miss Brad. But the show is literally bananas!
9- America's Next Top Model. This season is All Stars. But some of these girls aren't really All Stars- I think they are just the girls who didn't have anything else going on right now. It's kind of on the chopping block as well.
10- Project Runway. The designers are very weird this year. But very interesting all at the same time. I can't wait to see who's going to win it.
11- Jersey Shore. Snooki makes me embarrassed to be an American. She is beyond embarrassing this year. She has a boyfriend who she claims to love, but she still acts like single Snooki. Of course, one of the roommates makes a point. Her boyfriend knew who he was dating when he started dating her. It was just wishful thinking that she might calm down.

Last up- shows I've already taken out of rotation
1- Ringer. This is the new Sarah Michelle Gellar. I've gotta say- I expected better. I just had no interest in this show after getting mid-way through the second episode. Sad, but true.
2- The Secret Circle. A show about teen aged witches. Blah blah blah. It only got one episode as well before I axed it as well. Sorry CW. You are striking out.

Anyway, that's my rundown of shows this fall. I mean, let's face facts. After reading, TV watching is clearly my other favorite activity!!

---------October 8, 2011------------

Up All Night and 2 Broke Girls have been removed from my TiVo list. And American Horror Story was so crazy, I'm not sure if it will last more than one or two more viewings!

Hair dryer woes....

2011-09-15T11:14:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, I was happily getting ready for work one day. Well, happily might be an overstatement, but I was getting ready. I started drying my hair and all of a sudden, only cold air was blowing out of my hairdryer. "Crap, I must have hit the cold air button," I thought. Nope- my hair dryer was broken. And FYI- hair does not dry with cold air. After a few futile minutes, I learned that lesson. Luckily, I have a travel hair dryer, so I didn't have to go to work a wet head.

Later that week, I decided to bite the bullet and get a new hair dryer. So away to Target I went. Holy crap! There are a lot of hair dryers. I quickly decided against the $100+ Chi one. A leeeeetle too expensive for me. I tend to gravitate towards the $20 ones. There were some really cool hair dryers though. Pink ones, ones with patterns, all sorts of fun stuff. I ended up choosing a deep pink one from Remington. I am a Conair girl, but decided to branch out. To quote Julia Roberts, big mistake, HUGE.

The pink monster is heavy as lead. My arm is actually tired after the few minutes it takes to dry my hair. Yes, I said few minutes. 3, tops. The pink monster is also the most powerful hair dryer I have ever encountered. One would think that would be a good thing- hair would dry faster. Drying my hair any faster has never really been an issue for me. I just don't like the fact that my nicely combed wet hair is completely tangled by the time I finish drying it, thanks to the high powered monster.

Needless to say, I'm kind of stuck with the pink monster now. But next time, I'm going to hold each and every hair dryer that's on display before I pick one. Lighter is better. And I'm going back to Conair. They have yet to fail me!

I'm so glad I'm Jane of Columbia, rather than Jane of No place in particular.....

2011-09-09T05:51:00.000-07:00

I have always been a huge Anne of Green Gables fan. And when I say huge, I mean HUGE!! I've read all of the books in the series more times than I can count (and am re-reading them as we speak). I've also seen the movie quite a few times. By the time I was in middle school, Anne and I were already fast friends (or kindred spirits as she would say). So when summer vacation rolled around and my parents decided on Maine, my little mommy thought to herself, "Maine, that's right next to Canada. Prince Edward Island is part of Canada. Let's add a trip to PEI to the trip.". Just as an FYI- it was about 500 miles away. Not quite so "right next to," but whatever.

So off we went to PEI. And a better vacation I have never had! We went to Green Gables. I was actually offered a job due to how much I knew about the series. Sadly, I was too young. And didn't speak either French or Japanese fluently. Maybe I missed my true calling back there. I certainly still know more about Anne than about most other things. I got to see the Lake of Shining Waters and stroll through the Haunted Woods. I got to visit everything I'd ever wanted to see in Anne's world. And it thrilled me to my very fingertips!

By the time I had become an Anne fan, the first Anne movie had been made. While it wasn't exactly like the book (when is a movie ever exactly like the book?), it was so close that I was in raptures watching it. Megan Follows is unparalleled in her portrayal of Anne Shirley. A second Anne movie was also filmed. While it wasn't as faithful to the books as the first had been, it did a pretty good job of combining several of the books as best it could and certainly still captured the spirit of Anne. I own the first movie and hadn't watched it recently. So I decided to do so. Then I Netflix'd the second movie. Imagine my surprise to discover that in 2000, a third Anne movie was made (Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story) and in 2008, a fourth movie was made (Anne of Green Gables: A New Beginning). So I promptly Netflix'd both of them as well. The third movie has the same actors reprising their roles during WW1. Which is the last book in the series, when Anne's sons (not Anne and Gilbert) go off to war. While Megan Follows can still do no wrong as Anne, the movie itself was miserable. They introduced characters not in any of the books and story lines that would have made LM Montgomery cringe. They even had Anne and Gilbert move to New York City briefly, before they were married, so that Gilbert could work at Bellevue Hospital for a while. In the 1900's, that wouldn't have happened, even if they were living in separate apartments. No woman, unmarried, would have moved with a man. Anne got involved in espionage in France during the war. Gilbert was a POW. Needless to say, I was bitterly disappointed.

Then movie four arrived. After 30 minutes, I was already "in the depths of despair," as Anne would say. Anne is now a widow because Gilbert was killed during WW2. Now, Anne of Green Gables takes place in 1878, when Anne is eleven. Which means that by WW2, Anne would be in her VERY late seventies. The movie has her in her late forties at best. This movie was beyond disappointing. It completely changes Anne's history and back story. It changes everything about who Anne is. It doesn't even capture the spirit of Anne, especially guilty of this is the actress who plays the older version of Anne. It took every bit of my will power to actually finish the movie. And as far as I am concerned, this movie no longer exists. There were 2 Anne of Green Gables movies. And you will never be able to convince me otherwise! Sadly, it's 2+ hours of my life I'll never get back. But if nothing else, I'm completely enjoying rereading the Anne books. I'd forgotten how much I truly love them. They might have to be a yearly reread!

Life in the fast lane (it's where I prefer to drive)

2011-09-06T11:56:00.000-07:00

I ran into an old friend today who hadn't seen my new car. In fact, he thought I was still in a car I haven't owned in over 4 years. But it made me start thinking about all of my cars.

I grew up with parents who will drive a car into the ground. Only when it becomes unsafe is a car no longer a part of our family. We also name cars, but that's a whole other thing. In my entire life, my mother has had 3 cars and my father has had 4 (the most recent one being my old car). That's 33 years and a total of 7 cars here people! So I always thought I would be the exact same way. Wrong!

I got my first car, a grey-blue 1989 Honda Accord, for my 16th birthday. It was a complete surprise! I drove that car for nearly 4 years. Then, I got the Green Machine, a green 1995 Ford Explorer, during my sophomore year of college. Nothing was wrong with my Honda, other than it was small and I was driving to and from college. So my parents felt safer with me in an SUV. The Green Machine had many adventures and did a lot of tailgating. It was a great car and I loved it. In 2005 (I think), I finally got the car of my dreams- a silver Toyota Solara convertible. I named her Olivia. I have always wanted a convertible and figured, what better time in my life than when I had no responsibilities?! I had Olivia until I went to work at my new job, at which point she went to my father. I think he's changed her name, but I'm not sure to what. My new job came with a car. So my new car was a black Mercedes SLK350. It was a hard-top convertible (yes, another convertible). I named her Samantha. She was adorable, fun, sporty. But apparently, I thought she was also a submarine. One afternoon, after a flash rainstorm, I was driving to dinner. I saw a large puddle ahead of me, but didn't realize it was deep AND wide. In tiny Samantha went, and out she never came. I flooded the engine and she was never able to drive again. Next up, the black Mercedes E500. Black Betty, later to be known as Christine. I've gone through the saga of Christine before, so we won't rehash that. Suffice it to say, Christine needed to be gone from my life. And so she was. My new (hey- she's only a year old- that's still new) car is Fiona, a 2010 silver Toyota Highlander. After Olivia, Fiona's been my favorite car of all time. She is beautiful. She is functional. She's a winner! But let's look at this- I've been driving for a little over half my life now and I have had 6 cars. Yes, 6 cars!! That's almost as many as my parents have had TOTAL in double the time! I'm a little embarrassed at how many cars I've driven. But I have faith that Fiona will be it for me. Until death do us part. Her death, hopefully.....

August readings- I've been busy!

2011-08-31T18:51:00.000-07:00

My goal this month was to read more books than I read last month. Seeing as I bought an iPad at the beginning of the month and downloaded a few books onto it, I figured I could achieve my goal quite easily. And as I can tend to get bored with just one book, I read multiple books simultaneously. But that's a whole other issue.

Winter Garden by Kristin Hannah. This was my book club book (go ahead and realize there will be one of these a month!!) It took me a REALLY long time to get into this book. Which is odd because the "trailer" on the back of the book seemed really good. Sisters and a mother who have never gotten along and are forced to care for each other when the father/husband (the only person who connected them) dies. The mother is Russian and tells her daughters a Russian fairy tale. Which may or may not be a true story. Once the fairy tale got going though, I really enjoyed it. I found myself unable to put it down and there were even tears streaming down my cheeks as I finished reading. Amazing story.

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, The Marvelous Land of Oz, Ozma of Oz, Dorothy and the Wizard in Oz, The Road to Oz, The Emerald City of Oz and The Patchwork Girl of Oz by L. Frank Baum. The first became the first book I read on my iPad. Despite missing being able to turn pages and feel the paper, I rather enjoyed reading a book on my iPad. I have always been a huge fan of the movie, The Wizard of Oz, and the sequel, Return to Oz (a cult classic as far as I'm concerned.). And as I was looking through the free books on iBooks, I realized that I had never actually read any of Baum's books. So I downloaded all 14 that are in the Oz series. All of them proved to be easy reads. As for the first, I really enjoyed the "true" story of Dorothy (although the music was greatly missed!). The second and third books were clearly where they got the plot line for "Return to Oz". Many of the characters were the same as the ones in the movie. There is a boy named Tip in the second book who basically handles the role that Dorothy had in the movie. But Dorothy returns for the third, fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh books, with a cast of new characters. The fourth and fifth books are just more of Dorothy's adventures in Oz. The sixth book changes everything, as Oz is attacked by evil creatures who want to destroy it. After they are thwarted, Princess Ozma asks Glinda to make her country invisible to anyone who doesn't already live there, thus making it seemingly impossible for Baum to learn any new stories about Oz. Luckily, by book seven, he realizes that he can telegraph Dorothy and still learn more stories, without having to actually see her. So she shares with him the story of Ojo and his adventure to save his uncle from being a marble statute. I really enjoyed entering the world of Oz, in even more detail than ever before!

A Kiss in Time by Alex Flinn. Another modern day fairytale. This one was Sleeping Beauty. Exact same set up, only this time, she sleeps for 300 years. Gotta be tough to wake up in the 21st century to discover that not only does your country no longer exist, but you don't even dress correctly anymore! It's a very cute love story and was a GREAT beach read!

The Betrayal of the Blood Lily by Lauren Willig. She writes historical fiction about spies in the 1700-1800's and has a whole series of books. Fortunately, they don't all need to be read together (or in order) to be enjoyed. The modern day story that links all of the books is a grad student writing her dissertation on "Aristocratic Espionage during the Wars with France, 1789-1815.". The spies she discovers are all flower names. And some are even women. Her books are great fun. This one takes place in British-ruled India. A very easy read, and if you are a fan of historical fiction, Lauren Willig is a master of the field.

Summer and the City by Candice Bushnell. The next installment of the Carrie Diaries, which are the prequel to Sex and the City. In this one, Carrie has just graduated from high school and moved to New York to take a summer writing class at The New School. She meets (and becomes the roommate of) Samantha, meets Miranda, falls in love, has sex, learns her strengths as a writer and meets a cast of characters (some of whom return later in the TV show). It's typical Bushnell- easy to read and good fun. I read the majority of it while sitting next to my pool and finished it once I got back inside the house. Yep, I read this one in one day. Hello, my name is Jane, and I'm a bookaholic. It's a problem....

Dating, it's virtually impossible out there

2011-08-19T17:46:00.000-07:00

It seems like every time I turn on the TV, there are commercials about online dating. And all of them claim to be the way to find the love of your life. Oddly enough, I've actually tried online dating. Yes, me. The hopeless romantic has tried to be practical and find love in whatever way might be out there. Hey, it's worth a try, right?

First up, many years ago, was Match.com. The first guy was Fish Boy (see one of my earlier dating stories). The next was a guy I talked with quite a bit. We were even planning to meet. Then, one afternoon while we were talking, he had to go finish up some work and said he'd call later. That was about 7 or so years ago. Hope he hasn't lost my number....

Next up, eHarmony. It sucked. Nothing further to be said about that.

Third try, not really online, was It's Just Lunch. You actually meet with a matchmaker who asks what you are looking for in a mate. I had a few things. The first guy- divorced with a kid (I said no kids). The second guy- maybe 5'6" (I said taller than me). I didn't give them a chance to screw me over with the third date option. They didn't seem to listen to what I wanted.

Recently, I decided to try OkCupid. And omg- the guys on this site are disgusting. To the point that I might not even try to stick this out for very long.

To be honest, maybe I'm not really sure online dating is at all the way to go.....

They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

2011-07-31T10:47:00.000-07:00

One of my friends has a blog and occasionally blogs about the books she's recently read. I thought that seemed like a spectacular idea (as I tend to read quite a bit). So I've decided to copy her idea. At the end of each month, I'm going to do a little review of the books I've read that month. I'll go ahead and apologize- I've been a little lax this month on my reading. But with no further ado, July's books!

Sing Me Home by Jodi Picoult. This is NOT your typical Jodi Picoult. It's about fertility (or rather infertility), ownership of unborn children (I know, that sounds horrible), music, homosexuality and family. The only typical Jodi Picoult aspect is a trial. I'm not sure you can HAVE a Jodi Picoult without a trial! On the whole, one of my favorite Jodi Picoults. It was deep and very moving.

The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie by Alan Bradley. It's a story of an eleven year old chemistry genius who turns detective when she watches a man die in the garden and her father is accused of murder. I read it on the recommendation of a friend and didn't really enjoy it as much as I thought I would.

Little Lady, Big Apple and The Little Lady Agency and the Prince by Hester Browne. I read the first book in this series (The Little Lady Agency) for book club last month. It's British chick lit. Long story short, Melissa starts her own business as a girlfriend for hire (not a prostitute, as she makes sure people know). She gives make-overs, shops for gifts, attends events as a plus-one, you name it. Along the way, she falls in love (book 1), moves to New York briefly (book 2), and gets hired to transform a playboy prince (book 3). If you like British chick lit, this series is a winner!

Cloaked by Alex Flinn. I read another of Alex Flinn's novels recently. Beastly. Made into a movie that wasn't NEARLY as good as the novel. Flinn likes to modernize fairy tales. This one combined quite a few fairy tales, most of them quite unfamiliar to me. However, there was the one of the prince who was turned into a frog. The one of the shoe maker who is helped by elves. The one of the 6 siblings who are turned to swans and can only be saved by their sister (who doesn't know they exist). The one of the magic cloak that can take you anywhere you wish. The one of the magic fish who curses a man for wishing for too much. There were witches and giants. Humans who had been turned into animals. Princes and princesses. Love. And, most importantly, shoes. It wasn't a greatest piece of literature ever written, but I finished all 330+ pages in one day. So that says something!

My Reading Life by Pat Conroy. This is basically a collection of essays/stories about Conroy himself. He talks about people who have influenced him, books that have influenced him, the reason he is the writer he is today. If you like Pat Conroy and like books, it's a great read. Honestly, the only part I didn't like was that I felt like a fraud, saying I was a reader when there were so many books he mentioned that I haven't read yet. And as a Southern girl, I'm a little embarrassed to say that I've only read one book by Pat Conroy prior to this. An ex gave me The Lords of Discipline when we first started dating (to help me understand the whole Citadel way of thinking). I absolutely loved it and can't believe I haven't read any others. Might need to rectify that situation and, while I'm at it, add a few more books from Pat Conroy's list of must-reads to my own. Maybe once I put a dent in the pile of books next to my bed.....

And as I finished My Reading Life TODAY, that's it for the books read in July. Let's see what kind of damage I can do in August!

Books, books, I love books

2011-07-03T12:58:00.000-07:00

I am a bit of a bibliophile. Under both parts of the definition. A bibliophile is defined as someone who loves or collects books. As my current library scares people, I'd say I'm a bit of a collector as well. Sure, I don't collect first editions or anything exciting like that (other than my 1929 edition of Anne of Green Gables and a few other fun old books). But my library is still vast. A friend came over to borrow from the Library of Jane. When I showed her my list (it's 11 typed pages of books, alphabetically by author and separated by paperback, hardback and series), she was a little overwhelmed. I'm not going to lie.

Being a person who LOVES to read, it's usually my go-to activity when nothing else is going on. And definitely when I travel. I usually take one book per day of vacation. Nothing makes me happier than sitting on a plane or a beach somewhere, with a book in hand.

All that being said, I can do some damage to books. Last weekend, I read 3 books. For those of you doing the math, that's one book per day. I read "Dreams of Joy" by Lisa See. It was the sequel to "Shanghi Girls," a book I read for book club last year. It takes place in the early years of communist China. Very good. I also read "Witches of East End" by Melissa de la Cruz (the author of The Blue Bloods series). It's about (wait for it) witches. Good beach, mindless read. The last one was "The Little Lady Agency" by Hester Brown. It was for book club and was British chick lit at its finest!

The weird thing is that this weekend, I can't seem to get into any of the books that I'm trying to read. I'm trying to read two of them and neither are actually peaking my interest. So I think I'm going to have to switch it up and try some others. This weekend can't be a TOTAL loss when it comes to finishing at least one book, right?

Yep- I've been MIA lately

2011-05-19T18:20:00.000-07:00

Yes yes. I know. I haven't really been blogging a lot lately. And by a lot, I mean not at all. At least in the past 5 months. Despite my New Year's resolution. Oops.

I'd like to say it's because I've been really busy lately. That I'm such a popular girl that I have no time to blog. But that would be a lie. Honestly, it's simply because I think I've lost my funny. I used to blog a lot. Making pithy comments and amusing the public (or at least myself).

So right now, I'm sitting here, watching Grey's Anatomy, playing on FB, and drinking a SkinnyGirl margarita (yummers). And blogging. Yep, blogging.

And I've realized that I've kind of missed it. I don't really have anything important to share. Other than I'm back. And hopefully (if not now, then soon to be) better than ever! Stay tuned kiddos....

Happy happy New Year, blogosphere!!

2011-01-01T05:26:00.000-08:00

In honor of 2011, I have decided to start the new year off right and blog a little bit. Seems like a normal thing to do. New year, new blog entry. I'm not a big fan of making resolutions I know I'll never keep (hello never used gym membership, I'm talking to you). So this year, I decided to make some resolutions I can keep.

1- I will try to blog more frequently. Key word in this resolution is try.

2- I will take more pictures. I always carry a camera with me, but seldom remember to take pictures. Even last night, we only snapped a few pics with my camera.

3- I will give up drinking again for a little bit. My migraines are getting out of control recently and that's at least one thing I know I can control.

4- I will spend more time with the people I love.

5- I will not make any more resolutions than these.

Hope everyone has a wonderful 2011!!!

Jane of the Jungle (or maybe just the outdoors)?

2010-12-08T12:43:00.001-08:00

I have truly been remiss in posting blog updates lately. And by lately, I mean the last 2 months. And there's really no excuse for it, other than that I've been in the happy bliss of new relationship. Which seems to push most other things to the back burner.

But, no more.

I'm back (well, sort of. At least for now).

For those of you who know me (which I truly assume is all of you who read this blog), you know I'm not much of an outdoorsy girl. In fact, I hate to rough it and have been known to run screaming from anything dirt and leaf covered.

But, no more.

The beau has a hobby that I never thought I would be around. The beau is a hunter. Yes, a hunter. And he is taking NotSoPlainJane along for the ride!

Right before hunting season began, we went to one of his hunt clubs (yes, I said one. He REALLY loves to hunt) and shot some guns. As some of the other members watched, I picked up that first hand gun and POW! right by the bull's eye. After a little more showing off, I was done for the day. Everyone was mightily impressed with me, especially when they discovered that I had only been shooting once before in my life.

Next up, hunting season begins. While I'm pretty good with a gun, I'm not so good with shooting living things. At least, I can't personally do it. The beautiful doe staring at me with sad dead eyes only served to strengthen that decision.

However, I have now spent many a weekend at hunt clubs around the state. Even staying in... wait for it... a camper! I will say this though. It is actually a wonderful environment with wonderful people. And I will continue to be myself down there. Which means that when you roll up to the beau's hunt clubs, you will see me walking around, rocking my Joe's Jeans and fUgg boots. Hey, I'm still me. Dirty outdoorsy stuff and all!

Recap of my life lately

2010-09-10T07:51:00.000-07:00

I am currently on vacay with the parentals. So I figured this would be a great time to catch up on my blog. And quite a catch up I've got ahead of me! So let's get started, shall we?

Unlike last time I took a lengthy break from NotSoPlainJane-ing, I actually have been a pretty busy girl. I've been hanging out with friends, doing some traveling around the state (Edisto, Charleston a few times- Rockville Regatta anyone?), spending time with my family, reading loads of books and, oh yeah, GETTING A NEW CAR!! I know I have gone through the saga of Christine, nee Black Betty, ad nausuem. But suffice it to say, once the gasoline leak happened, she had to go. So off the parentals and I went to find me a new car!! I knew I wanted a Toyota SUV, so at least that was a starting point. So about 2 weeks ago, Fiona entered my life.

She's a 2010 Toyota Highlander Limited. Magnetic Gray Metallic. Which means she sparkles in the sunlight (LOVE it). She's got all the bells and whistles. And I am in love with her.

I've also attended weddings for the last two weekends in a row. Two weekends ago it was down in Charleston (I was the "and guest"). Last weekend, my boss got married. The weekend was crazy busy and Moss-tastic! Lots of friends, food and alcohol. Dancing, toasts, and did I mention alcohol?! I do love a wedding (namely because I like to pretty myself up and go glam). Unfortch, you can't wear cocktail to a law office. Or can you.... I know a girl who would like to incorporate a tiara into her every day wear. Cocktail dress can't be too far off, right?

And really, that's been my life for the past 2 months. Add in a new beau for extra excitement and I've been a pretty happy girl lately! Until next time y'all!

There's no place like gnome

2010-07-17T18:12:00.000-07:00

I have a college friend who owns his own landscaping company. Which means he's pretty into yard stuff. He and his wife invited the parentals and I to dinner a few weeks ago. I noticed there were some gnomes hanging out in his yard. He and his wife have a game. The gnomes "mysteriously" move around the yard. The parentals and I thought that was a lot of fun. So we helped one of the gnomes move.

A little while after that, my friend got the parentals a gnome of their own. I had some good fun moving him during a party at the parentals' house. He moved from the fish pond to underneath the wine bottle tree. I figured that was appropriate, being a wild party and all!

About a week or so ago, I came home to discover a gnome in my front "yard." It was cute and tiny and holding a flower. I immediately accused my friend, only to learn that they had been gnomed as well. Next on the accused list? The parentals. Oh yes- we had figured out the guilty parties.

A few days later, I came home to another gnome in my "yard." This one is slightly bigger, but still very cute and sitting with a bird in his hand.

Yesterday morning, I walked out of my house to find this note laying on the ground...

I immediately went into gnome-napped mode. I knew my gnome wouldn't leave the yard voluntarily. Even for a vacation with friends. Until I got the following picture texted to me by Pops...

Apparently, little gnome DID go on vacation. Along with my friend's gnome. I'm thinking of grounding him when he comes home though. I didn't give him permission to leave the yard, even if he is with the parentals.

TiVo or BFF?

2010-06-30T18:38:00.000-07:00

I got TiVo a few years ago as a Christmas present from my grandmother. Before anyone gets all excited about how hip my Dove is, she gives us money and lets us buy our own gifts. Can't say that it's not a good way to do it. But it's so cute when you thank her for what she "bought" you for Christmas and she doesn't even know what it is. God- she's so adorable!

What I love about TiVo is that it tapes things that it thinks you might enjoy watching. Sure it's weird to come home to shows about serial killers (alright, I really like that stuff) or History Channel stuff (no seriously- me no likey). But it's so much fun to see what TiVo has surprised me with each day!

The only downside to TiVo (ok there are two) are that I can't watch something and taped something else. I have old skool TiVo, yo. And that because I don't have wireless internet, being an internet thief and all, I have to have a phone line to get TiVo to show programs.

On Sunday, TiVo informed me that the programs would run out this weekend. That's weird, I thought. Guess I need to plug it into the phone line. Nope- I have no dial tone. That's the problem with TiVo! Here's the sad thing. Were it not for TiVo, I would have gone WEEKS without realizing that I had no dial tone. Of course, were it not for TiVo, I wouldn't even have a land line. So really, would it have mattered?

I wouldn't be a waiter if you paid me. More than a 20% tip!

2010-06-22T07:51:00.000-07:00

Sunday being Daddy's Day, I took my parents out to eat. I figure if I don't pay, Pops actually paid for his own Daddy's Day dinner (what with the joint bank account the parentals have and all). Pops really wanted steak, but all of the steakhouses had nearly an hour long wait. So we ended up at Chili's.

Little Mommy and Pops aren't really Chili's connoisseurs. In fact, Sunday might have been the second time they'd ever been. I, on the other hand, am a big fan. Especially of the molten chocolate cake. Yummers!

We sat down and our waiter trotted over. His name was Mark. The parentals decided he reminded them of Michael J. Fox. Long story short- he was one of the best waiters I've ever had (far exceeding "Beverly" at Hampton Street Vineyard). He was upbeat, he was friendly, he was funny. He got a great tip.

But I know I do NOT have the personality to be a waiter. I would end up cussing someone out. On a daily basis. Good waiters are rare. So if you are in the mood for Chili's, head to the one on Two Notch and ask to sit in Mark's section. You won't be sorry. Especially if you order the cake!

Technology- wasn't it supposed to make life easier?

2010-06-07T17:35:00.000-07:00

In November, I went up to NYC to visit my (as I lovingly call her) baby cousin (she's 27). The second night I was there, she had a little par-tay at her apartment. The champagne (and Sweet Tea Vodka) were flowing. And I got hammered. The result of getting hammered meant that I actually fell down at one point (shocking because I am a pretty coordinated drunk). And when I fell down, I spilled Sweet Tea Vodka on my phone. So I had to get a new phone once I got home.

I decided I had to have a phone with a full keypad and I did NOT want a Blackberry. So I ended up with the HTC Tilt 2. After about a week, I decided I didn't love it, but that I'd try to like it. After about a month, I knew I hated it. But by that point, it was too late to return it. Then, it got attitude with me.

Didn't you know that electronics can get attitude? Well, they can. And the Tilt did. It started freezing up while I would be typing a text message. Then, after a few more months, it started turning off when I would V-E-R-Y gently place it on my bed. Finally, I had enough. So last week, I headed to AT&T to make a change. That change was LEGEND- wait for it- DARY. I cracked and bought....

an iPhone

Holy crap- what took me so long?! Why did I think I wouldn't like the iPhone? Am I crazy? Short answer- yep. I am.

The thing is- now that my phone is finally working, another piece of "advanced, foreign" technology hasn't been.

The Mercedes.

Last summer, I was in Charlotte for a bachelorette party (super fun!). And all of a sudden, the air conditioning in the back seat turned into heat. And I mean BLAZING hot HEAT. It's still like that.

Last winter, I was driving up to Sparkle City. The car started getting a little warm, so I turned the heat off. And for the next hour, it kept turning itself back on every time I turned it off.

Last week, I was coming home from work and decided to hit up 5 Guys for dinner.
On a side note, why do the 5 Guys guys stare at me when I order the regular cheeseburger instead of the little one? They always ask me if I'm sure that I want the one with 2 patties. I do. That's why I ordered it, thank you very much. And if you want, I'll eat it here and prove that I can finish it. Because I can. But back to the story.
I was in the center lane of Forest Drive, attempting to turn left. And my car turned itself off as I sat there. Pardon? Black Betty- what's going on with you?

The next day, I left for work and Black Betty sounded a little odd. That's because the rear passenger side tire was flat. And as I sat there in my car, waiting for my mom and a tow truck, Black Betty decided to turn off. Again.

The guys at my tire place decided to check Black Betty out for me. And found nothing wrong with her. She didn't turn off. She ran like a dream.

Saturday, I went over to Irmo for a mani/pedi and some errands. While there, my car decided to not start. Eventually, once the towing guy showed up, she started right up. With the check engine light a-blazing. As soon as I got to my office (where I decided to leave her so she could go to the shop first thing Monday morning), she decided to turn off again.

This morning, we decided to use my car to drive to court. And again, she wouldn't start up. The guys were able to give her a little jump and get her a new battery. I don't think that will stop her from continuing to act up. I think she needs a new computer. Or a new spirit.

Oh Black Betty- I loved you. But Christine- no such love for you. That's right- I have re-named my car. She is possessed. No seriously. She is.

Oh how I suffer. And not in silence either!

2010-05-29T15:25:00.000-07:00

I realized that I haven't really been blogging a lot lately. And as I'm clearly more famous than I initially thought, I'm sure that has left legions of fans completely distraught. I apologize.

I wish I could say I'd been doing great things. I haven't. In fact, I have been having migraines for over one full week. Starting the day of my last blog.

I woke up May 17 with quite a migraine starting. It was a court day, so I just chalked it up to stress and hearings. Also, the fact that it had been a long weekend. Then I woke up with a migraine the next morning. And the next morning. And the next and next. Then Saturday night, the pain relocated from simply my temples and behind my eye to my neck. And for nearly 3 days, I was unable to turn my head.

My aunt has been a migraine sufferer for years. And a wealth of knowledge for me now that I am a migraine sufferer myself. Turns out that I was experiencing something called cluster headaches. They hit migraine sufferers and usually are a result of stress. It's like my body had been stressing out up until the point the headache hit. And instead of just one little headache, I had 5 or 6 a day. With shooting pains behind my eyes. And the neck. It was miserable.

So I finally went to the doctor for drugs. Ah, drugs.

I immediately went on steroids and muscle relaxers. Talk about loopiness. Steroids to hype me up and relaxers to make me drowsy. Awesome. I also slapped a heating pad on my neck and got a massage.

And to be honest, that's been my nearly 2 weeks since my last blog. Sad, huh.

Yep, I'm famous

2010-05-17T17:43:00.000-07:00

A few months ago, I met some girls who had read my blog before they had ever even met me.

A few weekends ago, I met a fellow attorney who had just read my blog earlier that week before he had ever even met me.

I feel like a rockstar, yo!

I guess I just don't think about how easy it is to find people/things on Al Gore's fabulous invention. He is a rockstar too you know.

Nothing is truly private anymore. If you put it out there, people can find it.

Case in point- there is a blog out there called FITSNews. Last year, they had a "contest" called Carolina's Hottest Lawyer. It was for female attorneys only. This year, it became personal. Some nice person decided to nominate yours truly. Aw- sweet. NotSoPlainJane is a sucker for flattery, y'all!

They want photos, so someone posted a picture of me from a Jersey Shore costume party. Which didn't bother me in the slightest. I think the picture is a lot of fun. It was a costume party for Pete's sake.

Then people decided to get all mean and judgemental on me. Saying that I shouldn't post a picture like that on Facebook. Really, Judgy McJudgerstein? I shouldn't? Why? Because I can't be a fun person and post pictures of my life? According to that person, it's a horrible picture and something I should be ashamed of. The people who should be ashamed are the cowards who are calling me ugly and a 1o-footer (whatever that means). Without having the balls to use their names.

But it did remind me that nothing is truly private if it's on the interweb. Good thing my fun-loving self doesn't get embarrassed by costume party pictures and the like. Wouldn't that be horrible?!

My baby girl

2010-05-05T12:20:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have absolutely no idea anything about me, I have a BEAUTIFUL baby girl, Lali.

See- isn't she gorgeous?

So many of my friends have the blessing and privilege of being able to tell funny stories about their kiddies. So I decided maybe it's time to tell stories about my kitty.

I got Lali about 5 years ago. She was from a large litter and weighed only 1/2 a pound. Just a little powder puff of cuteness. Thanks to love and food, she's now quite the beauty.

I'm not really sure when it happened, but she hates people. Whenever I have guests, she hides upstairs. If forced to interact, she hisses and growls and attempts to bite. I do know that a few years ago, my mom took her over to their house so my cleaning lady wouldn't freak out (she doesn't like cats). I got a call from my mom after work and went to pick up the cat. She was hiding in my bedroom, hissing and snorting. But as soon as I got her in my car, bundled up in a towel, she was fine. And she's been a little bit crazy ever since. She doesn't snuggle. She doesn't love on me. She's the definition of an independent cat.

I took her to the vet last week. She cried the whole trip there. Watching her at the vet hurts my heart. She braces herself on the table and just cries. I'm never going to make it with children! But then, when I take her home, I let her out of her ADORABLE polka-dot carrier and she can wander around the car. Her spot of choice? Curled up in my lap, head buried under my arm.

My favorite thing about my girl is that she likes to listen to me sing. I will sit in my den, singing. And the cat will come running down the stairs and sit in front of me, just listening. It is the cutest thing ever (and certainly feeds my ego).

Anyway, that's enough about my beautiful girl. I love her so much. I really do.

Mirror Mirror on the wall, I am my mother after all

2010-04-20T06:41:00.000-07:00

When I look at pictures of my parents, there is no doubt where I came from. I am the spitting image of the both of them!

But that's where the similarity used to end. Yes, I'm a lawyer, just like my dad. And even briefly followed in his footsteps by being a prosecutor. But he told me I shouldn't be a lawyer. Yes, I'm pretty music. Which comes from both parents. Mom can sing and play the piano. Dad is pretty good on percussion and used to play the accordion. No- I do not lie. The accordion. But then we have the differences. Both of them enjoy sports (tennis, golf, other sports when they were younger). I detest playing sports. I was a dancer and cheerleader growing up. I think you would have had to threaten my parents with death for either of them to dance or cheer.

The older I get, the more I become my mother.

I worry about pleasing everyone.

If I wake up at night, I obsess about things until I can't sleep anymore.

I won't actually confront people who piss me off, but I will talk about it with a friend.

Don't get me wrong- there are still some major differences. But with every passing year, I become more like this amazing woman. And I hope that makes her proud.

Never trust a person who doesn't have a nickname

2010-04-14T14:54:00.001-07:00

A few days ago, I was discussing nicknames with a friend of mine.

Nicknames make me happy.

One of my friends, The Fourth (for those of you who read Eat Drink and Be Mary...Douglass, you know who he is), is the KING of creating nicknames. He has two for me: Roush and Guy la Roush. Both stem from an incorrect pronunciation of my last name. But he nicknames everyone.

Then I starting thinking about all the nicknames I've accumulated in my life.

JR
Junior
Punkin
Olive (as in Oyl)
Janer
Jane Fish
Janathan

The list goes on. It made me start thinking though. Of all of these nicknames, very few people use more than one of them. Pops calls me Punkin. Little Mommy calls me JR. They don't call me any of those other nicknames.

Then I was talking to my cat this morning while I was getting ready. Don't judge. She talks back.

Her name is Lalita. She was named for a Hindu goddess. "Lalita is a woman-child Goddess. She delights in all play and pleasure. The universe is a great toy to Her, created for Her enjoyment." I figured nothing described a cat better than that! But I call her Lali.

Anyway, this morning, she decided to peek in on my shower. I saw her little paw on the glass and started talking to her, calling her Buggie. I nicknamed her Lali-bug, which eventually got shortened to Bug, which then became Buggie. Amongst her other nicknames:

Doodle-bug
Doodle
Doods
Princess Fluffernutter
Stinker (a nickname I have also given my parents' cat)
Bugalicious
Stinker-doodle

I'm sure there are others I have forgotten. But it made me realize something. My cat has more nicknames just from me than I have been given by all the people I've ever gotten a nickname from. And to be honest, I think most people probably nickname their pets more than anyone else. Sad. But true.

I dreamed a dream

2010-04-07T18:52:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been having some crazy weird dreams. They have made me anxious, they have left me confused, they have woken me up early.

They have, in fact, been so strange that I have decided to start a new blog just of my dreams. Every morning I'll write a little about my dreams. If for no other reason than it will be really cool to read them back. And maybe, just maybe, some of my loyal readers are blessed with the gift of dream interpretation and can help me out here. It would be most appreciated. I actually have a dreamer's dictionary (a gift from my wonderful Davidson roomie because of my weird dreams) and I use it quite frequently. Of course, if you don't care to read my new blog, that's cool. I'm really more excited about doing it for me anyway!

http://jane-dreamalittledreamofme.blogspot.com/

So there you go, beloved readers. There's nothing up there yet. But it's coming. I might even back track and discuss some crazy past dreams. You never can tell what's going to happen in Jane's little dream world.

It's about how you see yourself

2010-04-03T11:15:00.000-07:00

Body dysmorphic disorder is a type of chronic mental illness in which you can't stop thinking about a flaw with your appearance — a flaw either that is minor or that you imagine. But to you, your appearance seems so shameful and distressing that you don't want to be seen by anyone. Body dysmorphic disorder has sometimes been called "imagined ugliness." When you have body dysmorphic disorder, you intensely obsess over your appearance and body image, often for many hours a day. You may seek out numerous cosmetic procedures to try to "fix" your perceived flaws but never are satisfied. Body dysmorphic disorder is also known as dysmorphophobia, or the fear of having a deformity.

I once saw a talk show about body dysmorphia. I can't remember if it was something legit, like Oprah, or crap, like Tyra. Either way, I came to the conclusion that some of the people who suffer from it are crazy. Because there was nothing wrong with them, at least physically. The others truly did have a problem. Extreme eating disorders are a form of dysmorphia and I've always wondered how an anorexic cannot see that at 80 pounds, they are too skinny.

Then I realized that almost everyone I know has some form of body dysmorphia, even if it's not an extreme form.

I was talking to a friend of mine a few weeks ago. She is absolutely GORGEOUS. But she sees a flaw in herself that no one else sees. Something that I didn't even notice when she pointed it out to me. But it is something that bothers her.

But I really started thinking about it in terms of myself. In the past year, I have lost 10 pounds (not by choice, I'll have you know). EVERYONE comments on how skinny I am. Yet I still see areas where I could lose weight. Even after getting on the scale and seeing what I weight. Even after trying on clothes that used to fit perfectly and now fall off of me. I still don't see myself as others see me. And I guess that's what body dysmorphia is really all about.

The first step is admitting you have a problem

2010-04-02T17:36:00.000-07:00

I'm going to go ahead and admit it.

My name is NotSoPlainJane and I'm addicted to (so bad that it's good) reality TV. Originally, it was Real World and Road Rules. Now I can't be bothered with the new episodes of Real World. But I still find myself drug into the Real World/Road Rules Challenges. Only because they truly seem to bring back the crazies I loved so long ago.

My love affair with reality TV hit a new high this fall. That's right- MTV introduced us to Ronnie, Sammi Sweetheart, the Situation, Pauly D, J Woww, Snooki and Vinny. AKA The Jersey Shore cast. Life will never be the same. I watched every new episode. I watched marathons on the weekends (you know, in case I missed something funny the first time around). My BFF and her hubby threw a Jersey Shore joint birthday party- my costume was Jersey-tastic!

My new guilty pleasure has become the girls of Pretty Wild on E!

These "sisters" (the 2 youngest are full sisters, I think the oldest is a half-sister. Or maybe adopted. I'm not sure) are famous for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Okay, so the middle one got arrested in connection to all the robberies from celebrities' homes that were going on in LA. But they are hysterically funny. One of them becomes upset that Ryan Cabrerra (yep, that retard with the dumb hair who dated Ashlee Simpson back in the day) doesn't want to date her. They have no brains, very little ambition, but wow! are they amusing! The only thing I don't get is why the entire family constantly says "And so it is." What does that even mean?

Anyway, I just thought I'd share my love affair with reality TV. I ain't ashamed. No seriously- I'm not at all ashamed. They have rehab for this, right?

This one's for you Marshall Erickson!

2010-03-31T19:01:00.000-07:00

Last Friday night, I hit 5 Points for Happy Hour for the amazing MegLee. She was home for a visit from jolly old England. Okay, so technically calling Columbia home is a stretch (as her home is Arizona). But whatever...

After Happy Hour turned into hours (and Grilled Teriyaki), I headed back to my car. The one thing I had forgotten to do before going to Village Idiot was feed the parking meter. So what was waiting on my car when I got back to it? Yep- an orange envelope and a parking ticket. Oh well. I'll just pay it.

Yesterday, I went to write the check to put in the Clemson-colored envelope from hell. I happened to glance at the ticket. No, no one had switched tickets with me (you never can tell- I've heard of that happening). It was my car. My tag. But the time of issuance of the ticket? 6:08 pm. When do meters in 5 Points become freebies? 6:00 pm. It does NOT take 8 minutes to write a ticket. Which means that ticket was issued incorrectly.

Take that City of Columbia meter maid. You just got lawyered. And don't think I'm not going to argue about why I shouldn't pay the ticket. I think my law degree might FINALLY come in handy! Huzzah!

AMENDMENT as of 9:30 am this morning: I called the City to make my argument. Who knew that the meters in 5 Points have to be fed until 7 pm?! Damn City- that's awfully late in the day. And effectively destroyed my argument. So they'll now get my $7. Yep- I was going to the mat for $7. Bring it on!

Tucker Max is my hero. Well, sort of...

2010-03-29T14:48:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't know the above pictured fellow, this is Tucker Max. Officially, he is a lawyer (graduated from Duke Law). But more importantly, he has a blog. And some books. And a movie. He's also a bit of an a-hole (according to him, not me. I've never met him).

Anyway, the reason he became so "famous" is his blog. Which oddly enough started out as a joke. Women could send in their pictures and an application to hook up with Tucker. I found that to be quite a humorous way to get your start. Especially if it means ending up with a movie starring Logan Huntzberger from "Gilmore Girls!"

So I started thinking. Perhaps I should turn my blog into a new blog. Or simply start a new blog. Where men can apply to be my husband. Think it will work? Applications will be available later this spring.

Soulmates?

2010-03-27T17:58:00.000-07:00

Nothing makes me giggle as much as people talking about their soulmates.

I am a CRAZY romantic. No, seriously. If you don't know me, this is something you should know.

But I find the concept of only being blessed if you get to marry your soulmate to be complete hogwash. So many people talk about how their lives are complete now that they have married their soulmate. And I feel kind of sorry for them. I don't think your soulmate is necessarily the person you are meant to marry.

Sometimes, your soulmate might be the person who was everything you needed at a certain point in your life. Sometimes, your soulmate might be a person to whom you simply could never be married, even though they make you happy. Sometimes, your soulmate might be someone of the same sex who is meant to be your friend for life. Sometimes, your soulmate might even be a family member.

But to say that your life is incomplete if you don't get to marry your soulmate? Well, doesn't that kind of limit what a soulmate really is?

I guess you can officially call me a clothes horse

2010-03-21T14:36:00.001-07:00

This weekend was spent cleaning out my closets. I've got quite a few closets in my house, none of them very big. But it's just me, so I feel that I should use all of them. One closet in my bedroom is used for dresses, suits and jackets/blazers. On the floor of that closet are boots and various shoes (sneakers, Danskos, etc.) The other closet in my room is used for shirts, skirts and pants. On the floor of that one are some of the rest of my shoes (heels, sandals, etc.) Of course, there are about 20 boxes of heels stacked outside of my closet. Yep- it's a disorder. I'm seeking help.

The closet in my guest room is only half-full. I keep it that way on the off chance that I have an overnight guest. I mean, they've got to have somewhere to hang clothes, right? But that closet has cocktail and formal dresses. And all of my purses.

The closet in my study is what I lovingly call my transitional closet. It contains off-season clothes (which means it's got my winter clothes in there right now) and clothes that I need to sell. This time around, it also holds clothes that aren't fitting me right now. I know- everything you read says to get rid of stuff that doesn't fit you. But they are referring to that size 2 dress that will never fit now that you are comfortably a size 6. I've experienced some extreme weight loss lately, so my clothes will eventually fit again. I know I'll gain some of that weight back.

Anyway, my closets (other than the one in the guest room) were almost bursting at the seams. I had forgotten some of the stuff in there. So I pulled everything out of 3 different closets and threw it all on the floor/bed/hallway. Then it went into one of three piles- Trash, Sell, Keep. Trash pile- small. And already in the garbage. Keep pile- pretty big. But happily back in my (no longer quite as stuffed) closets. Sell pile- embarrassing. And covering the floor and bed of my guest room.

The added benefit to this Spring Cleaning fever was that I did some thinking about myself. Spring Cleaning's not just for your house and closets, folks. It's good for your soul.

Movies, they aren't just romantic on screen

2010-03-18T12:12:00.000-07:00

So a few nights ago, I was watching TV and up popped a commercial that "Sahara" was going to be one TBS tonight at 8 (or some crap like that). Anyway, it got me thinking about movies, especially love stories, and movie stars. And if movie stars watch the movies they star in long after they finished filming.

In "Sahara," Matthew McConaughey and Penelope Cruz play love interests. And they dated in real life. Obviously, that relationship wasn't a keeper. But I wonder if either of them watch that movie and feel awkward that they were dating at the time.

There are lots of other couples like that. Penelope Cruz and Tom Cruise. Gerard Butler and every female movie star. Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens. There are countless examples of couples who fall in love on and off screen. And while it's great for Angelina Jolie to say that not a lot of kids get to see the movie where their parents fell in love (you know, while one was still married to someone else), I wonder how awkward it must be to watch a movie where you fell in love with a costar and now you have fallen out of love.

Yes folks, these are the things I wonder about sometimes. I'm a deep thinker.

A dream is a wish your heart makes

2010-03-16T18:48:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching Disney's latest princess masterpiece, "The Princess and the Frog." For those of you not up on your Disney princesses, this particular princess is a waitress in New Orleans. And she's black. Yep, Disney finally decided that every girl can be a princess. It's about time! The movie was wonderful- I found my head bopping along to the music, the storyline was intriguing, and the characters (other than the Shadow Man) were lovable. It made me remember all the other Disney movies I've always loved.

Growing up, I was a HUGE Disney fan. Clearly, I still am. I would watch those Disney princesses by the hour, never tiring of their stories. I still can. My cousin's little girl (ie My Favorite Person on the Planet) can't get enough of those Disney princesses. She's had the theme parties, the costumes, the works. One of my best friends loves Disney so much that she and her husband spent part of their honeymoon at Disney. And had so much fun that they returned for their one year anniversary. Don't think I wasn't a little bit jealous!

So much of Disney appeals to both children and adults. But what's sad is when you realize that what Disney is peddling is so beyond the fairytale that you are unable to face reality. There isn't a Prince Charming out there for every princess. Not everyone is guaranteed a happily ever after. Sure, it's great to dream. But dreams don't always come true. Don't worry though- I won't tell the kids that. Because sometimes, it is still good to dream. Reality will come soon enough.

But they're cousins, identical cousins and you'll find...

2010-03-15T15:35:00.000-07:00

This is me and my dad, faithful husband to one woman.

This is Mark Sanford (minus me), adulterous governor of South Carolina. I've got some connections folks, but they aren't good enough to get me a pic with Marky Mark.

For some reason, people think Pops and the lover of Argentinian tail look alike. I've never seen the resemblance.

The parentals and I love a little McAllister's for a meal. A few years ago, the parentals were in there without me. And one of the cashiers/waitresses informed them that she and some of the customers were pretty excited that Governor Sanford ate at McAllister's. And apparently that he was stepping out on Jenny even before the state trip to South America.

The funniest for me, though, was when I got an email from a friend of mine. She was at lunch at Zoe's with another friend. Both of them got very excited to see Governor Sanford walk through the door. Until they saw my mother walking in with him and realized that it was my dad and not the governor.

Oh well. I guess if I can't be famous, it's nice to have a famous (or infamous) dad!

According to Rob Hyndman, lawyers should enjoy their work and clients. Today I truly did.

2010-03-10T16:28:00.000-08:00

As a bankruptcy attorney, my day is spent meeting with clients. Some of those clients are new clients, trying to determine whether bankruptcy is the right move for them. Some of those clients are existing clients, trying to get advice about a problem with their case. Both types of clients come in and out of the office, one right after the other. And most of them make no real impression. Other times, they are super memorable. And today was one of those days. I'm going to ignore the bad memorable ones (yep, I'm talking to you, Affliction-attired skeezer) and focus on the ones who made me glad I do what I do.

My first existing client of the day was the cutest little grandmotherly type. I was able to help her with what was going on with her case. She immediately started crying. For those of you who don't know, I am a sympathetic crier. So I started crying along with her. She asked me if I was a Christian (which I am) and told me God works in amazing ways. I agreed. Then she asked what color my kitchen is. Kind of gold I told her. Because she was going to knit me a dish towel for my kitchen. When she got up to leave the office, she grabbed me up into a big hug and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I love clients like her!

Another existing client was a super friendly fellow. After talking with him, he told me I do a really good job, I am very efficient, and my boss should give me a raise. Doggone it, I love clients like him too!

Am I just too Southern?

2010-03-06T10:01:00.001-08:00

This is a Folgers commercial that truly bothers me to no end.

First of all, the father and daughter seem to actually enjoy Folgers coffee. If nothing else, it speaks well to their acting abilities. Because Folgers coffee is crap. It's instant, after all.

Second, I'm going to go under the assumption that the daughter is actually an adult. So why does she have an implied curfew?

But what really gets to me is the daughter's reaction to her father when he says that he talked to Todd last week. Why does she seem so surprised? If I were the girl in the commercial, I'd be more shocked if my boyfriend/new fiance had NOT asked my father for my hand in marriage. Isn't that how it's supposed to go?! Or am I just too Southern for my own good?

It's not confusing, it's deep

2010-03-04T13:49:00.000-08:00

I have been a huge fan of LOST since the second season. Wait, what? The second season? What about the first season, NotSoPlainJane? Well, I kind of didn't watch the first season until it came out on DVD. Why not? Because I had too many other shows going on. However, once I was turned on to the wonder that is LOST, I was hooked.

The best thing the creators of LOST decided to do was repeat the "enhanced" episodes prior to a new episode. Lots of times, these enhanced episodes help remind me of stuff I'd forgotten from the previous 5 seasons. I wish the enhancement would point out things that are important, but I guess that would be asking for too much. Anyway, the point of this is that I now watch each episode twice. And notice things the second time around that I didn't always notice the first time.

Last week's regular episode/this week's enhanced episode was an interesting one. And a conversation between Jack and Hurley really stuck out to me. They exited the jungle and came upon the Lighthouse. Jack said, "How is it we've never seen it before?" To which Hurley replied, "Guess we weren't looking for it."

How true is that about most things in life?! Things are always right under your nose. But until you look for them, you don't even know they are there. A deep thought from Hurley (who's quite the deep thinker, I think). Despite all appearances....

Signs, signs, everywhere signs

2010-03-02T16:49:00.000-08:00

I'm a big believer that there are signs everywhere. Not street/traffic signs. I mean that stuff that whacks you in the face. I never used to believe in signs. Or coincidence. I guess that's my dad talking there. He always says there no such thing as coincidence. Coincidence isn't God's plan. I will say, though, that I do now believe that there are signs. Horrible movie, but interesting points, was "Fools Rush In." Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek. Big mistake for both of them, but I did like some of points brought up. The reason this couple ended up together (you know, aside from that baby that resulted from their one night stand) was that there were too many reasons for them NOT to be together.

Sometimes, you don't realize at the time that there are signs pointing you in different directions or shaping different parts of your life.

For example, I should have known that someday I would have more than a passing connection to the state of Arkansas when I house sat for a law school professor and found a Razorback pig hat in his closet. Now, did I think it would mean that Pops would end up in Little Rock for cancer treatments? No. Should I have been shocked that's where he ended up? No.

Here's another one for you. One of my best friends didn't live in Columbia for part of high school (we didn't become friends until college). She moved back to her mom's neck of the woods. Where was that? Janesville, Wisconsin. Was there ever a doubt that we would be friends?!

I can think of countless other things that have happened in my life. Things that should have led me to different ideas about why things have gone the way they have gone.

Why is it though, that people who talk about signs or how something is so coincidental seem to be the ones who run from those things when confronted by them?

"True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and choice."

2010-02-22T14:51:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking a lot about the nature of friendship lately. I once heard a saying that I believe to be very true. You have friends for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I have friends who fall into each of those categories. And each and every one of them has been important. Like how I used the past tense? That's because some of them aren't in my life anymore.

Some friends come in and out of your life quickly. Some friends come in and don't leave (even though you wish they would). Some stick around for the long haul.

Friendship truly is a symbiotic relationship. It's amazing how many people think that friendship should be parasitic. They take and take, never offering anything in return, to your detriment. Those people, well, are they truly friends? Others view friendship as a commensal relationship. They will take, but it doesn't really affect the person they are taking from in a negative (or positive) way. Other relationships are competitive. This is never a good thing. Don't get me wrong, a little healthy competition is good for the soul. But if your entire relationship exists to try to one-up each other, perhaps you should rethink your friendship. The relationship that a friendship should be is a mutual one, where everyone involved is benefiting from the friendship. If you truly find this relationship, don't ever take it for granted and don't ever let it go.

When I look at my true friendships, I know they are mutual relationships. These people love me, for the person I am and the person I may become. If I need them, they will drop everything and come running. They will talk for hours if I need to vent. And they know that I will do they same for them. For a true friend, nothing is too much to ask. And even if you don't talk or see each other as often as you'd like, you know they are there.

While those other friendships can be fun, you know in your heart that they aren't making you a better person. Or maybe they did, but now you have outgrown the friendship. There's no shame in realizing that some friendships aren't meant to be forever relationships. It's never easy to let them go. But sometimes, it's for the best. Because it opens you up to the possibility of a new "forever" friend. And those are rare and precious commodities.

For the love of green!

2010-02-16T18:31:00.001-08:00

So last night, I had to run by the pharmacy for a prescription. As I was walking out, I noticed the small shelves of half-price Valentine's candy. I wasn't interested in buying any, as I didn't really need any candy in the house. However, I am a candy/chocolate lover, so I had to look at what they had to offer. And what do I see? This:

Yep- that's a bag of nothing but green M&M's. Now, if I remember correctly, the green ones allegedly make you horny, right? Then why is it being marketed as the new color of love? Is this even remotely appropriate, esp for Valentine's? I think not. But hey- maybe that's just me.

I hate that today is considered a "holiday"

2010-02-14T09:51:00.000-08:00

I have never been a big fan of Valentine's Day. When you are single, it's the one day of the year that makes you feel even worse about being alone. And when you are dating someone, there's too much pressure. Plus, if you think you can prove to me in 1 day that you love me more than you've shown on the other 364 days of the year, you've got another think coming. I am the girl who usually "celebrates" V Day by giving people dirty looks and wearing all black. But this year, in honor of this non-holiday, I'm going to provide a list of things that I currently love.

My parents
My friends
My cat
The fact that there is still some snow on the ground
Cherry coke
My snuggie
Heart-shaped pizza from Papa John's
Vampire books
The movie Loverboy (yes, it was on TV today. And yes, Patrick Dempsey was/is super adorable)
My camera because it's pink and actually didn't delete my pictures from New Year's
Ginger snaps
My skinny jeans (which I find myself shocked to say)
Footie pajamas
My humidifier
Wellies (they have come in very handy this weekend)
The sweater I got for Christmas
Hot chocolate
Conversation hearts (even though I haven't had any this year)

This year, I'm glad V day falls on a Sunday. Sunday tradition means I'll have dinner with the rents (who will always love me, no matter what). Perhaps this Sunday, we'll have some heart-shaped pizza and Valentine's candy instead.

I will judge you for using poor grammar

2010-02-07T19:56:00.000-08:00

As an English major, I feel that I have earned the right to be critical of other people's grammar.

But NotSoPlainJane, you yourself have been guilty of misuse of grammar.

Touche my adoring readers. Touche. I have been known to be a little loose with my grammar. Heck, I make up words. My degree allows me to do so. And nothing you can say will convince me otherwise.

Lately though, there have been some real doozies that are getting to me. First off, the use of the word literally. As in, "When that cute boy came over to talk to me, I literally died." Actually, you figuratively died. If you had literally died, an ambulance would have been called and you wouldn't be sharing this tidbit with me. I might literally scream at someone the next time I hear it!

Next up, ending sentences with prepositions. Namely, with and at. For example, "Where's it at?" Worst sentence in the non-English language. I have been known to respond to the above question with the following sentence- "It's AT right over there." Sadly, the questioner doesn't seem to realize that I am mocking them. Then again, they are the ones who don't speak well.

Some of my other big ones are using incorrect words/tenses. The ever popular I vs. ME debate. Using the word I doesn't make it more proper. If it's used incorrectly, it makes you sound like a dumbass. Do not say "Come to the party with Bob and I." Ugh. The two incorrect words that I have heard most recently are undescribable and irregardless. Just go ahead and stop using those words right now. Neither of them are actually words. As I said, I'm a big fan of using words that I've made up (my ever popular craptastic comes to mind). But at least I acknowledge that I am using my power of English-majoredness to allow me to make up these words. I don't actually think they are words!

I swear, bad grammar is becoming as annoying to me as bad etiquette.

"It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.”

2010-01-30T14:15:00.000-08:00

I've got quite a few scars on my body. While I might not remember how I got each one, most of them truly do have a story attached.

The small dot of a scar on the inside of my right wrist? Hospital, 7 years ago, when I almost died.

Weird dark scar on my right elbow? Tubing on Lake Keowee this summer. It might go away later in life. It might not.

Numerous scratch-like scars on my hands and arms? Um, hello. I've had cats all my life. You antagonize them enough, they aren't happy.

The funny one in my belly button? That's where I had a mole removed during college.

The small one on the right side of my chin? Same as my belly button.

The double scar on my right knee? (Is anyone seeing a theme here with the right side of my body?!) It's from two totally different accidents. The first was falling off of my bike while racing my dad when I was in 5th grade. The second was right before Christmas. I was "tripped" walking across a parking lot. It was an inadvertent trip. I kind of did it to myself. Someone's leg just happened to help me fall.

Then there are the scars on my kidney from the staph infection. I can't see them, but I know that they are there. And if I have any scans done, doctors will see the scars.

The worst scars I have though are the scars that no one can see. The ones that I know are there. The ones that the person who caused them knows are there. And they are probably the ugliest scars I have.

Widgets-R-Us

2010-01-29T10:33:00.000-08:00

I can't remember when I started talking about widgets, but I think it all began in law school. I know they came into my lexicon during 1L Contracts class. Did I talk about widgets before that? Maybe. I don't know.

I wish I was creative enough to come up with the widget that is going to make me millions. I will think of something, then think to myself who in the hell would buy that, and move on. Then I discover that people are selling chair socks. Yep. Chair socks. I do not lie. Someone decided this would be their way to make millions. http://charlesandmarie.com/chair-personality-socks And there are people out there buying this crap.

So I've decided that the next time I have a fantastically retarded idea, I'm going to write it down. And in a few years, when I decide that I don't want to be a lawyer anymore, I'm going to find my widget. Just wait. It'll happen. Probably about the same time I win the lottery. Which I don't play. Hey- a girl can dream.

Time in a bottle

2010-01-20T18:17:00.000-08:00

A few years ago, I signed up to receive a daily email called Daily Candy. It tells me about clothes, jewelry, vacation spots, cool knick-knacks and fun websites. Once, there was a link to futureme.org. It's where you can write a letter to yourself that will be delivered to your email at a date in the future. Very cool stuff. You can tell your future self what is going on with you at an exact time in your life. Or what you hope you are doing at a future time in your life.

But one of the coolest websites that Daily Candy suggested was thememoryjars.com. It is an entire website of glass jars. You move your arrow over each one and it contains a date, a name, and someone's very important memory. Some of them are simple, some of them are deep. Some of them make you laugh, some of them break your heart. But it made me start thinking, if I could save some of my memories in jars, which memories would I save? Not the memories that people tell me about, or I see pictures of, but the memories that I truly have for myself. The first time I fell in love and what that felt like. The first time my heart was broken. Seeing the pride in my parents' eyes whenever I did something well. Dancing by the light of the Christmas tree at my grandparent's house with my mom. Watching my grandparents on their 50th anniversary and seeing the love that was still there as Bubba sang to Dove. My first glass of champagne at Christmas with my family. The high school football game in Charlotte when my parents came up to watch me cheer and stood at the fence with Dad's arms around Mom because she was cold. My first piano recital playing with Mom. I could probably fill my house with these jars.

If you could save a memory in a jar, which memory would it be?

Nobody's got no class....

2010-01-10T10:31:00.000-08:00

I've noticed that the Boy and I have been going to see a lot of movies lately. Not that I don't love a good movie. I miss getting to go to them for free though.

Anyway, back to the point. On New Year's Day evening, the Boy and I double-dated with another couple. We went to see Up In The Air. Which was a great movie. The problem was the people sitting behind us. They spent the entire second half of the movie talking and laughing. To the point that I wanted to turn around and say something to them. I too paid money to come see this movie. I do not appreciate you ruining my viewing experience. Of course, when we realized that the girl had basically mounted the guy during the movie, that took it to a WHOLE other level!

Last night, we went to see Daybreakers. Which was an okay movie. The three girls sitting next to me (I mean one seat away next to me) laughed and texted during the ENTIRE movie. First off, when you pull out your phone, the light of it catches my eye and distracts me from the movie. Second, Daybreakers was NOT a funny movie. If you are having a funny conversation during a $9.00 movie, please go elsewhere. I would like to focus on the movie. Laugh at the occasional funny parts and get freaked out by the scary parts.

Basically, I'm just wondering whatever happened to manners. I know I blogged about airplane etiquette before. But now I feel like everyone, everywhere, has forgotten that other people are around. I try my best to be conscious of other people. I expect the same courtesy from others. Apparently, that's expecting too much.

To sleep, perchance to dream. Or just keep waking up.....

2009-12-26T06:58:00.000-08:00

Sleep. It's a beautiful thing. And one of my hobbies, I'd like to think.

When I was a newborn, my mom never got any sleep. She likes to tell me that until I was 8 months old, I never slept more than 2 hours at a time. My Dove says it was pay-back because my mom didn't ever let her sleep. I tremble in fear at the idea of my own children. There's going to be hell to pay for me!

When I was in high school, I slept the sleep of the dead. My mom has always been a night owl. She would actually vacuum my room at midnight and I would never even wake up. The scarier part is that I also apparently talk in my sleep. Not just random babbling, but rather answers to questions! I've often wondered what things I've said when I thought I was safely sleeping.....

When I finally bought my own house, I no longer sleep well. Living alone (sorry Lali, you don't count as a roommate) makes your senses much more heightened. Case in point- a few weeks ago, I am soundly asleep, Lali curled up at the foot of the bed. As an aside, I'm sure the bell on her collar adds to my lack of sleep. Anyhoo- I wake up to the sound of something. I wander all over my house, looking in every corner. I am calling out to the possible intruder that I will soundly kick their ass if they mess with me (yes, the alarm was set. And no, it had not gone off to register a break-in. It was 2 am, leave me alone). Turns out something had fallen in my shower. But by that point, I couldn't fall back asleep. Damn suction-cupped razor holder.

Another night, I woke up at 3 am to the sound of shattering glass. Convinced that an intruder had broken a window to get into my house (again, alarm had NOT gone off), I wandered around my house for a few minutes. Then I saw it. The doors to my wet-bar were slightly open. That's odd. They stay closed at all times. I open to doors to discover that one of my glass shelves has fallen, and the casualties were frightening. Wine glasses, gone. Antique tea cups from my Grammy, shattered. I sat on the floor and cried for about 15 minutes. After that, I got to work. Fortunately, my two favorite tea cups had managed to survive the disaster. By the time I finished cleaning up, I just decided to begin my day.

The best was the night that one of my neighbors decided that 2 am was a GREAT time to hammer her walls. You heard me, HAMMER. She lives 3 doors down from me, yet I had no problem waking up to her noises. At first I thought it was contractors on the under-construction house next door. I know, because 2 am is when most contractors work. But no- it was crazy neighbor. I feel like ear-plugs would help me out a lot. But then how would I hear my alarm for work in the mornings?

Bankruptcy attorney, through and through

2009-12-22T13:00:00.000-08:00

I've come to the realization that, while I might not be the best bankruptcy attorney on the planet, I have become a bankruptcy attorney. Being surrounded by people who actually understand the frequently confusing world of bankruptcy every day at work is certainly a part of it. Dating a fellow bankruptcy attorney also doesn't hurt. But it hit me last night that I am, in fact, a bankruptcy attorney.

I was over at a friend's house for our annual Christmas get-together. There were 5 of us in attendance. I started telling a work story (namely because it is an amazingly horrible story and was not about any of my clients.) The story (Reader's Digest version) went as follows:

Apparently one day at meeting of creditors, the trustee knew that one debtor was going to lie under oath. The trustee repeatedly reiterated that it was perjury. That debtor lied. The next couple, however, had apparently had the crap scared out of them. When asked about the children he was supporting, he told the trustee he had 4 children. His wife responded that they had 3 children. Turns out that for 10 years of their 13 year marriage, he'd been paying child support for some child the wife didn't even know about.

One of my friends looked at me and said, "Jane, there are about 8 words in there that I have no idea what they meant."

Man, I've been doing this for too long already!

'Tis the season.....

2009-12-22T05:38:00.000-08:00

For parties, engagements and the like. Which I love. Christmas seems to be a time for, at least when you overlook the maddening commercialization of the season, love. And that's the part of Christmas I love.

But what I don't love, and what is one of my biggest pet peeves, is children at adult parties. If the invitation says "Mr. and Mrs. Joe Bob" and there is no mention of Little Sally Sue, Billy Bob or family, do not, I repeat, DO NOT bring your child along to the event. This goes double if we are talking about a wedding. It seems that at least one wedding a year, someone brings their infant and the child screams during the entire ceremony. And the parents, for some inexplicable reason, decide that they don't want to miss the ceremony so it won't bother anyone if they just sit in the church with the screaming child. Don't get me wrong, I adore children. But not when I am trying to listen to my friends say their vows. As an aside, please turn off your cell phone before entering the church for a wedding. Because if it's not a child crying, it's a cell phone ringing to disturb a ceremony. Also, when the hosts tell you that their child will not be in attendance, that is a clear sign to you, the parent, that your child is NOT invited. Of course, maybe I say all this without a clear understanding of what it means to be a parent. Perhaps when I am a parent, I will take my child everywhere. But I will say this, my wonderful parentals did not take me to cocktail parties and the like if I was not included on the invitation. After all, you never can tell what type of party you might be subjecting your child to.....

Another thing that annoys me at Christmas time (and throughout the year if I'm being honest. Which I'm trying to be on this blog) is strollers in tight places. Examples- the fair, the mall. I get that you don't want to have to carry your child around. And that strollers are EXCELLENT for carrying your gift buying haul. But as someone who has neither child NOR stroller, I really don't like it when I can't walk around without bumping into a stroller. Or when you decide that your 3 year old should get to push the stroller and they keep pushing it into me. Here's my biggest question, and perhaps it shows the world that I don't have kids, but why do you want to bring your too young to enjoy it child to the fair? And how do you manage to effectively do your shopping when you have a screaming 2 year old? I'm just saying....

I will say this though. At the appropriate time and place, nothing is more fun that a child at Christmas time. This year, Junior League had PJ's with Santa at the Holiday Market. And those kids, in their adorable jammies and with the joy of Santa on their faces, could not have been cuter. And COMPLETELY appropriate!!

Christmas shopping

2009-12-16T13:36:00.000-08:00

First- let me put it out there that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It's got cool(ish) weather, great food and family time. Without presents. What? NotSoPlainJane hates presents? I can't believe it. Oh beloved readers, you couldn't be more wrong. I ADORE prezzies. The more the merrier. However, I hate Christmas presents. I am much more of a "I found this, thought of you and want to give it to you now" present-giver. Which means I never have presents to give to people on their birthdays or Christmas. Because I gave the perfect gift yesterday. The thing I truly loathe and detest the most each year is Christmas shopping. The malls, the sales, the traffic. All of it. It's just too much. And all of this is to celebrate the birth of Our Lord. It boggles the brain.

That being said, I am usually pretty johnny-on-the-spot with my Christmas shopping. Last year, I was purchased and wrapped about a month before Christmas. I was a rock star. This year has been an entirely different story. I still have 4 more gifts to purchase. Fortunately, I know what to buy for all but one. It's just a matter of getting it done. Dang it. Where is my personal assistant to get all of this done for me?

So I've made an executive decision. Next year, I am going to give everyone BK bucks. You've seen those commercials, right? Or I'm going to buy everyone a star. Simple. Easy. Ridiculously cheesy. Hey- I'm known to be lazy when the holidays roll around. I decorated. I put Christmas tunes on the iPod. What more do you want from me?!

So I know I've been a little MIA lately......

2009-12-08T14:17:00.000-08:00

I realize that all of my adoring fans have been waiting with bated breath for a blog update. I'm going to simply delude myself into thinking there are hundreds of you. It makes me feel better about myself. It's the little things folks. Don't try to tell me that it's not true.

I'd love to say that I have been off doing great things in the time I've not been writing. If it makes YOU feel better, then I've been off saving the world and giving cat toys to homeless pets. No seriously- I've really just been lacking in creative inspiration lately. Is it because I haven't been doing anything fun since my last post? Not really. I've been having a lot of fun lately. I went to visit my "baby" cousin (who just turned 27) up in New York. Other than one day of rain, the weather was perfect. And we had so much fun, even just sitting in her apartment watching "Willow" and "Return to Oz." If you had to IMDB those movies, you are so not cool. They are classic staples. Classic my friends. I'm thinking I definitely need to add them to my DVD collection. Nothing beats Val Kilmer as Madmardigan or a flying chaise lounge Gump. My only complaint- not enough Toto in "Oz."

I've been attending quite a few gatherings/parties. I both love and loathe the holiday season. Parties are fun, until you realize you've got too many to attend. I've been to a turkey fry, where I provided a nice homemade mac and cheese. Yes, I can cook. Quite well. Don't judge until you've tried it. And after you've tried it, you will love me more. I've also attended my god-dog's 5th birthday party. Nothing says happy birthday Pig like cupcakes and champagne. As if I didn't love her enough already, she has good eats at her party!! Sadly, I didn't get to take a doggie cupcake home for my girl. I didn't think she'd enjoy it all too much. Being a cat and all. Next up, the Junior League Holiday Market Preview Party. The band was the Mighty Kicks and I am pretty sure I have NEVER seen that many people on the dance floor. Actually, I am pretty sure I've never been on the dance floor. It was great. The next best part, after seeing everyone all prettied up, was the champagne cocktail. I will do anything for champagne. There, I've said it. And there are multiple Christmas parties on the list for the next few weeks. My social calender fills up quickly people. I'm a very important person!

I ordered (and am about to return) P90X. After getting all of the stuff in the mail, I'm not to sure it's the right thing for me. Perhaps it's back to the Y. With my wack-a-doodle schedule, I can definitely manage to make it in there when there aren't a lot of people around. I hate going to the gym when it's busy. They've also got some pretty interesting sounding classes. That might be just the thing to get me motivated enough to get some exercise in weekly. That and perhaps all of my beloved fans holding me to it.....

What it all boils down to is, I've been a very busy girl (or at least I like to pretend like I am) and a very uncreative girl lately. I'm going to try to do a little better now. I promise.

Flying- apparently it's considered a right

2009-11-12T18:08:00.000-08:00

I like to consider myself a pretty polite girl. I say please and thank you, sir and ma'am. I say bless you when people sneeze. I let other drivers out in front of me (sometimes, when they haven't pissed me off). I cover my mouth when I yawn and my nose when I sneeze. It's probably because my mama raised me right. You just do these things. Especially in the South.

The South is such a magical place. The men stand when a lady leaves from, or returns to, the table. The men hold the door open for you. I remember my freshman year at Davidson, a campus FRAUGHT with Southern gentlemen (and also some of those Yankees). One of the girls on my hall was from Connecticut, you know, right outside of The City. Anyway, we were headed to the dining hall one night. Coming towards us was part of the football team. As the first Southern boy held open one door for us, Hallmate headed straight for the other to open it for herself. The rest of the team laughed at him as I walked through the door he still held open. She's a Yankee was all I could offer up as an explanation.

I like to think the South I was raised in is how normal people act. But every time I travel, I realize it is not. People can be the rudest when they are traveling. In the past four months, I've flown on three different trips. Which is definitely way above my average. It astonishes me that people do not recognize proper flight etiquette. For example, if you are sitting next to someone who is not in your traveling party, do not hog the arm rest. There is only one for the both of you to use. Share it. Leaving the plane should not be a free-for-all. I am in just as much of a hurry to get to my next gate as you are. If you are 12 rows behind me, wait your turn. Do not barrel down the aisle like a thoroughbred at Churchill Downs. And please refrain from hitting me in the arm/head/back with your over sized "carry-on." I get that with this new charge to check luggage, people don't want to spend extra if they can avoid it. But seriously folks, a suitcase the size of a 6 year old is NOT carry-on. Also, when you are walking to your next gate, realize that there are other people walking behind you. Keep with the flow folks. Don't just stop, mid-walk, and allow people to bump into you. Because if you are then going to turn around and be mad at me for running into you, we might have words. And believe me, they will not be words you want to hear.

On a plus note, when you somehow luck into a seat all by your lonesome at the very front of the plane. Or have a perfectly pleasant seatmate. Well, airline travel sometimes isn't all that bad.....

Taylor Swift can read my mind

2009-10-29T13:07:00.000-07:00

My best friend Dee and I LOVE Taylor Swift. Despite the fact that the girl is like 12 years old, her music speaks to me. I listen to her lyrics and I hear both past and present relationships being discussed. It's quite interesting. And speaks to a level of maturity that a 19 year old perhaps shouldn't have.

But Dee brought up a great point about her song "You Belong with Me." Please take a look at the following example of lyrics from that song.
"But she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts. She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers"
"She wears high heels, I wear sneakers. She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers"

Taylor Swift herself wears short skirts and high heels. While she might not have been cheer captain, that's because at 16, she was a multi-platinum award winning country singer. Who the hell needs to be a cheerleader when you are making bazillions of dollars by singing? I'm just saying.

But the funniest observation came from Dee herself. In high school, she was the one who wore short skirts and high heels (still wears the heels). And in high school, I was a cheerleader. And we were the misfits that Taylor claims to be in her song. The Irmo girls hated Dee. And the boys never picked me. Sometimes, the boys, even in high school, pick the outcast girl over the high-heeled cheerleader. Maybe it's because the outcasts put out.

Saturday was my 7th birthday!

2009-10-26T17:36:00.000-07:00

Ok- not really. But Saturday, October 24th, was a pretty big day for me. Seven years ago, it fell on a Thursday. Let's look at the time line of that week.

Wednesday, I woke up feeling pretty crappy. I thought I had one of those 24 hour bugs that was going around and that I'd slept wrong because I woke up with a pain on the right side of my back. I called in sick to work and crawled back into bed with my heating pad. That night, I was hosting Bible study at my house. The girls came over, I stayed in bed.

The next morning, Thursday the 24th, I woke up still feeling bad and with back pain. I called in sick to work again. Mom called to check on me later in the day. She asked me to take my temperature, which I did to placate her. In went the thermometer. That didn't seem right. I'll take it again. Huh, 104 degrees. That seems awfully high. I called Mom to let her know and she immediately freaked out. She told me to get dressed so she could take me to the ER. We arrived at the ER (let's not even discuss the fact that I was almost insurance-less because I didn't want to have to pay for Cobra because I wasn't considered a full-time employee yet and therefore didn't have health insurance). I was absolutely freezing cold by that point. Eventually, the nurses took me back into a room. They would only give me one blanket. They took my temperature again. This time, it was 106 degrees. They took my blood pressure. It was so low, I should've been dead. I remember watching the nurses freak out and rush out the door to find a doctor. I remember thinking it will all be fine. I'll be fine. Of course, the next thing I know, I wake up in a room in the IICU. I have tubes in my arms and attached to my chest. But guess what, I woke up.

The next day was Friday, October 25, bar result day. I lay there in my hospital bed all day. At four o'clock, bar results are posted on the Internet. Guess who didn't have access to a computer. And guess who sure as hell wasn't going to wait until Monday to get my results in the mail. Yep- this girl. So I called the Supreme Court.
Hi, lady at the Supreme Court. I was just curious if I could get my bar results from you.

Um, we don't give those out over the phone. You can either check the website or you can wait for your letter to arrive.

Ma'am, those aren't options for me. I am currently lying in a hospital bed in the IICU. I can't check the website and I can't wait until Monday. I nearly died yesterday. I HAVE to know if I am a lawyer.

Fine- I can check for you. Do you remember your bar examination number?

Did I ever?! That crap was emblazoned on my brain for months. I told her my number. In the most annoyed voice I've ever heard, I hear this:

Congratulations. You passed. Click.

Oh my god- I passed the Bar!! I started crying and then I heard the nurses next door calling out their congratulations. They saw my heart rate spike on the monitor and knew I had passed. My nurse came in to celebrate with some bubbly (ie ginger-ale). Later that night, I ended up having chest pains and had to go on oxygen.

Eventually, after stripping some veins and having quite a few CAT scans (cherry flavored barium made me throw up), they finally figured out what was wrong with me. Staph infection in my kidney. As my doctor told me, my kidney would no longer have a career in photographs. It is apparently quite pock-marked and scarred. But I am alive. And I am an attorney.

I love the Fair so!

2009-10-13T14:01:00.000-07:00

Guess what starts tomorrow people. That's right- the South Carolina State Fair (it sounds better when it's sung, but you get the idea.) I absolutely LOVE the Fair. It's usually here during my birthday, but we won't talk about how it has disappointed me this year by coming a week later.

The Fair has always been one of my favorite things. Heck, I wrote a poem about it in the 4th grade.

I love the fair so

The ducks are the best and you

Always win a prize

I'm not ee cummings, but it worked. And I do not lie about the ducks- I even pilfered one in college. It has sunglasses. The other good game- the water gun one. Provided it's only you and one other person playing. Preferably the person you went to the Fair with. That way, you are guaranteed to win!

Growing up, the Fair meant lots of things. My birthday, lots of fun and good (and by that I mean unhealthy) food, and getting your sweaters out of the attic because cold weather had arrived. Damn global warming- now the Fair means only fun and food.

I've got friends whose family has turned attending the Fair into an art form. I kid you not. At least one member of the family is out there every day of the week. Whether just for lunch (which is free from 12-2 y'all!) or hanging out at night. You call them to find out where the Bailey's Pronto Pup stand has moved (although their corn dogs haven't been up to par lately), where the granny smith caramel apples are, any specials that might be happening. I'm not kidding- they are the go-to family. Going to the Fair with them is an experience. I've not yet made it with the entire family, but I've been with bits and pieces of them. It is always fun times!

Anyway, this year I'm not sure I'm going to make it to the Fair quite as much as I'd like (if at all). I am hoping to go on Thursday night. But I don't do the Fair in the rain. I will probably be out of town on Friday night. And then I leave for Vegas (again) on Sunday until Wednesday night. Oh well, as long as I make it at least once and can eat at least one bite of each of my favorite foods (corn dog, Fiske fries, elephant ear, caramel granny smith apple, strawberry lemonade, tiny doughnuts, fried something disgusting and fattening- Reese's, Pepsi, etc), I will be a happy girl. I promise. Just one day.

Oh South Carolina State Fair, how I love you!

This place is 'Buck (if only I was as cool as Lil C)

2009-10-06T06:34:00.000-07:00

So this morning, I didn't have to be at work until 10 am. Which was nice. Except for the fact that my cleaning lady was arriving at 8:40 am. Please don't judge me for paying someone to clean my house. I hate doing it myself. And I LOVE my cleaning lady. She's been cleaning the parental's house for years and she's just great. But back to my "story."

So the cleaning lady arrived at 8:40 am. I walked out of the door shortly thereafter. But where to go and what to do? Answer- Starbucks in the Vista. Free WiFi (allegedly, if you have a Starbucks card that you've paid for) and a free drink (it's my birth month y'all!). So off I go to the 'Bucks.

I park and immediately run into a friend of mine. We chat while in line. Then she heads out while I set up camp by the door (the only true place to people watch). Across from me is mayoral candidate Steve Benjamin (vote for him y'all- he's a great guy!). As I'm sitting here, in walk a few other attorneys I know. It's like party central up in here!

Long story short, I think I might have a new morning tradition. Assuming I can get my butt up early enough on the mornings I have to be at work at 9 am. Oh- who am I kidding?! I'll be sleeping. But dreaming of people watching at the 'Bucks!

Don't judge- it's a Southern thing

2009-10-01T08:51:00.000-07:00

I know it is a very Southern thing to use family names repeatedly when naming children, but there is a slight possibility my family has taken it to a whole new level. Observe the following family tree. Middle names which are of no importance will be left out, so as not to confuse the masses.

Julian Spencer Dixon Jr. (aka Bubba) married Mary Ellen Richardson (aka Dove)
Their three children:
1- Mary Dixon married Eric Ruschky
Child: Jane Spencer Ruschky
2- Julian Spencer Dixon III married Charlotte Smith
Children: Mary Corinne Dixon married Seth Woolwine
Cori's children: Charlotte Barker and baby girl due in December
Julian Spencer Dixon IV married Joy Wray
Spence's child: Julian Spencer Dixon V
3- Jane Dixon married Spencer Player (yep, she married a Spencer)
Child: Mary Ellen Richardson Player

So basically, on any given holiday, you can stand in my grandmother's house and call out any combination of the following to get everyone to respond- Mary, Ellen, Jane or Spencer. There are lots of nicknames and lots of Big/Littles going on. And to be honest, I wouldn't have it any other way. Let's face it, I'm planning on naming my future daughter Spencer. I'm all for continuing the insanity. One generation at a time.....

Pet peeve #1, part B

2009-09-27T16:00:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I know I've already blogged about how much I hate other drivers. But every time I drive on I-26, I hate other drivers even more.

Over the last 9 months, I've spent a lot of time driving on I-26. I've gone to Charleston, Greenville, and, most recently, Spartanburg. Pretty much once a week for the past 9 months. And I swear to you, drivers on that particular highway are the worst. Maybe not on the planet (because I haven't driven on EVERY highway). But they might very well be some of the worst in the state.

Every time I get on I-26, I get stuck behind people driving under the speed limit. I know that I am a pretty speedy driver. I usually go about 15 over the speed limit. But seriously, if you aren't going to at least drive the speed limit, please get out of the fast lane. And if you are an 18-wheeler, do not, I repeat, DO NOT drive in the fast lane. That is for passing purposes only. Okay, passing and fast driving. If you aren't doing either, get the heck out of my way. No seriously, I will give you dirty looks once I can pass you.

And while we are at it, please actually get into the intersection if you are going to make a left-hand turn. Nothing pisses me off more than missing a light because the person in front of me refuses to edge their way out into the intersection so they can make it through the light. That has been happening to me a lot lately and I end up not happy, waiting for the next light. Which inevitably is a LONG wait. I'm not sure why.

In conclusion, if you see me coming, just get out of the way. It's my roadway. I bought it all when I got a car!

Clients- every attorney's dream?

2009-09-21T13:40:00.000-07:00

I was a prosecutor with the county for quite a few years. I started working at the Solicitor's Office during my senior year of college and just never seemed to leave. In fact, I never saw myself leaving. I wondered why in the world people would want to go out into the private sector. Who would have thought I'd end up there myself?! And doing something that is SO 180 degrees different than criminal prosecution?!

One thing I always wondered about was why people complained about their clients. My thought was really, they can't be THAT difficult. Oh, young and innocent Jane. They CAN be. What gets me the most is that some clients can be so unappreciative. Yes, I understand that you are paying me to represent you. But seriously, I'm a lawyer, not a magician. If you mess up, there are times I can't fix it. Unfortunately, the law actually ties my hands sometimes. And when the statutes tell me I can't do something and there's case law to back it up, sorry client, you are out of luck. Currently, I'm the one trying to help you out. And while we are at it, don't take out your frustration on the paralegals either. You might not believe it, but they too are trying to help you out. Along with our HUNDREDS of other clients. But seriously- when you do stupid crap, you are only hurting yourself. Of course, to some degree, this feeling applied to my cases at the Solicitor's Office that involved victims. I mean, when you allow a person you don't know to "spend the night" at your house, don't get mad at me when they steal your sterling silver!!

I could write page after page on my crazy clients (or my former crazy victims). But I'll refrain. I have been hung up on, cussing at and yelled at. To the point that I've wanted to cry. But sometimes, every once in a while, I get to help someone who truly appreciates me and our office. Having a client cry tears of relief or give you a hug because you are helping them save their home is a feeling you just can't put into words. And I have to say, that makes up for all the other crap.

Historical, hysterical, whatever.....

2009-09-19T13:02:00.000-07:00

In eighth grade, my South Carolina history teacher was Mrs. Sabo. Mrs. Sabo was awesome. The woman had done it all. She was offered multiple camels in exchange for her hand in marriage in Egypt. She went on a date to a rodeo with Elvis about 2 weeks before he became famous. She said he was a boring date. She was quite a little bit nutty as well, but in such a fun way. Any of you Hammond kids know what I'm talking about!

Back to the point of the story- she offered an extra credit option for us over Christmas break. That extra credit option was to find historical markers. If we found 20, we got some sort of extra credit. She informed us that there was a book out there that listed all of the historical markers in the state. She also informed us that we were not allowed to simply purchase the book and write them down. We had to go find them. The parentals and I, being the nerds that we are, took this as a challenge. The book was purchased. I was never allowed to look at what the markers said. Mom used the book simply to find where the markers were located. You have NO IDEA how many there are in this state. To this day, Mom has the book in her car and if we pass one we've never seen before, we mark it down. Yep- nerds to the core.

Anyway, we travel a lot to see family during the holidays. So side trips were made to find any and all historical markers in the area. My favorite was when we were near Orangeburg. The book told us the general vicinity, but we couldn't find the darn thing to save our lives. There was someone walking down the road where this alleged historical marker was located. We asked said person where the marker might be found. Said person responded, "You looking for that hysterical marker? It's just down the road. That hysterical marker's been there for years." Yep- hysterical marker. We still call it that.

By the end of Christmas break, I was ready to turn in my extra credit option. I didn't have 20 markers listed. I had over 100. I got so damn much extra credit, I think I aced every test for the rest of the year. Without even having to try! Ah- the joys of private school!

Old age is a bitch!

2009-09-17T05:32:00.000-07:00

With my birthday coming up in less than a month, I have come to the recent conclusion that I am simply getting old. Or at least, my body is.

I tore ligaments in my ankle my senior year of high school. It was brutal. Right in the middle of a cheer during a football game. And it put me in a cast for about a month. Thereby ruining homecoming week for me. Three years ago, I sprained it by stepping off the curb wrong. No, I wasn't drunk. And no, I wasn't in heels. I was wearing flip flops and going to lunch! A year later, I resprained it running through the Charlotte airport. Again, no, I wasn't drunk or wearing heels. I was in my Danskos. I tend to NOT injury myself in my super high heels.... Anyway, I frequently find my poor ankle has a dull ache going on. Like when the weather changes. I know. Sad.

A few years ago, I started having knee problems. Diagnosis- chondromalacia. Feel free to look that crap up. Irony- it is called runner's knee. Which I don't do. At all. I did physical therapy on it. Still, my knee hurts quite frequently. Again, usually when the weather changes. It's also the reason I don't work out so much anymore. That's what got my knee hurting in the first place. And there's nothing sexy about having to wear a knee brace AND an ankle brace just so you can get some exercise in.

But here's the kicker. Last week, I woke up with back spasms. Today I woke up feeling achy. My immediate answer to these problems? Grab my heating pad and slap it on the ache. Yep- I own a heating pad. Actually, I own two. That's just because I thought I'd lost the first one so I bought a new (and even better) one. It works like a dream. But I'm just hoping that the next thing I start grabbing isn't a hot water bottle. Or some sort of chest rub. Or one of my 50 cats. When that happens, people I beg of you, take me out of my misery!

These are a few of my favorite things...

2009-09-13T16:42:00.001-07:00

So this weekend, I was in Myrtle Beach for a work conference. Huge hotel rooms all to myself ALWAYS make me happy. We went out Friday night (of course we did- I was with work people! We love to go out). However, as an aforementioned blog stated, I am off the sauce. So I was out til 1:30 am and I was sober! It meant I didn't get a lot of sleep, so decided to bail on classes Saturday afternoon and get a nap in. Upon awakening I realized naps might be one of my favorite things in the world. Which made me start thinking about some of my other favorite things in the world.

Champagne (even though I'm off the sauce)

Brie (baked, melted, a nice chunk of it, pretty much any way it's offered)

Big glass showers in hotel rooms

Fireplaces

The smell of beach breezes

Dove's spaghetti

The smell of Mom's bread (even though I don't really like to eat it)

My best friend from high school's perfume (Tea Rose)

Brand new books

Chai tea from Starbucks

My blanket from Laura Ashley

Stargazer lilies

Chocolate

The smell of babies

Cherry Coke

Kissing

The clothing that goes along with cold weather

My Louis Vuitton

TiVo

My family

Reality TV (especially if it involves singing, dancing or modeling)

Dark hair and blue eyes

Gossip magazines

I have a feeling Julie Andrews/Maria von Trapp wouldn't be all that thrilled with some of the items on my list. But they do make me happy!

Get thee to a nunnery!

2009-09-09T15:55:00.001-07:00

For those of you who knew me in high school, you will probably remember that I was pretty much boyfriendless for darn near my entire high school career. For those of you who knew me post-high school, you might be a little shocked by that revelation. However, I had a plan back then. And I'm going to share it with y'all now (and invite anyone to join!).

I'm going to start a non-denominational convent. We will, just like nuns, be the Brides of Christ. However, we can go out on dates with boys. We just can't ever marry them. Our "habits" will not be ugly black dresses with wimples. Instead, something sexy. Like jeans and halter tops. Or sundresses. Or the above modelled ensemble. We won't have names like Sister Mary Katherine. But instead, names like Sister Good Time or Sister Sexy Pants. We will all get donations and buy a really cool house somewhere like the Hamptons or Miami or the Caribbean. Where we can have our "nunnery" in peace and quiet. Or craziness. Whichever.

Feel free to submit an application to join my convent. Basically name, photo and agreement that you don't plan on marrying as long as you are in the convent. After all, Father Cutee left the priesthood to get married. I won't judge if you leave my convent. Mock you incessantly, but never judge! Please don't get offended by this post- I am in no way trying to be sacrilegious. Not at all!

Breaking up is hard to do......

2009-09-08T13:22:00.000-07:00

Dear Alcohol-

I think the time has come for us to end our tumultuous relationship. We've been together a long time. We've had some good times. We've had some bad times. We've had some times I don't remember (although thank goodness, not too many of those). You've helped me through tough times in my life. And you've made some good times even better (or worse, it depends...)

Anyway, I've been noticing that lately, you've really been giving me a headache. At first, I thought it was just that I'm not 21 anymore and can't recover as well. Then I decided to test you out. I had half a beer last night. And woke up with a headache this morning. Damn you, Alcohol. You've done me wrong again.

So for now, we're going to have to take a little break from each other. Maybe, at some point in the future, we can try again to make our relationship work. I'm not saying that I never see us spending time together ever again. But for now, all good things must come to an end. And this time, it's not me. It's you.

Love, Jane

M-I-C- see ya real soon!

2009-09-07T14:42:00.000-07:00

I've frequently been compared to a teen aged girl. It has nothing to do with my youthful looks and everything to do with my music/TV/movie choices. I'll spend an afternoon watching the Disney Channel and think nothing of it. Of course, it does give me something to talk to My Favorite Person in the World about. She's a HUGE Disney fan. Definitely makes me a cool cousin. I have no problem singing along to Hannah Montana or High School Musical. Or discussing why I actually prefer Selena Gomez to Miley Cyrus.

I remember when Disney Channel was a station you had to pay extra for. Would the parentals spring for it for their angel? Nope. I know you people think I'm spoiled because I am an only child. But I was denied things. I was! But every year Disney would do a few free weekends. And I lived for those weekends! MMC, Avonlea, Kids Incorporated. I loved it all. And still have old episodes on tape. Yep- I said tape. As in video.

The funny thing is that sitting here watching Disney, I wonder about the appeal of the Jonas Brothers, Hannah Montana, those Sprouse twins. Then I remember what I used to love as a kid. New Kids (although they are STILL hot), the MMC guys, Tiffany. And I'm sure there were women in their 30's who wondered what I saw in the popular acts of the 80's and 90's. After all, it's not every act that I wonder about. Just that stupid Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus!

The hills are alive....

2009-09-06T12:16:00.001-07:00

Last night and today, I've been happily ensconced on my sofa, watching "The Sound of Music." Arguably one of the best movies ever! I sing along, I laugh, I cry.

Sadly, my nerdiness takes over every time I watch a movie and I end up IMDB'ing the heck out of it. Did you know that Christopher Plummer hated filming this movie and called it "The Sound of Mucus"? Or that Liesel (who was 22 at the time) sprained her ankle during "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" and had to perform the whole scene with her ankle wrapped up? Or that the kids grew so much during the filming that they had to put them in lifts so that their height didn't change? Or that the real Maria von Trapp has a cameo in the film? Or that the von Trapp kids were mad at how their father was portrayed in the film because apparently he wasn't so stern and officer-like in real life? I know- I'm a dork. And I love knowing all of this trivia!

And nothing beats Julie Andrews. I hate that she had to have surgery on her throat, resulting in the loss of her beautiful voice. She's still one of my favorites.

But what gets me every time is that Maria, who thought she was going to be a nun, ends up married to a widower with 7 children. There is no way I could have done that! I mean, I love kids. But really- after wanting to be a nun?! Although I've never been a nanny, so maybe you fall in love with the dad when you fall in love with the kids....

Football season has begun....

2009-09-03T19:07:00.000-07:00

I remember when I used to ADORE football season. Simply because it was football season. Now, I just like it because it means that fall is upon us and fall is my favorite season.

Growing up, I was a Clemson fan. Down to my "I'm behind the Clemson Tigers" bloomies and my cheerleading uniform. We didn't go to a lot of home games, but we always watched and we always cheered big.

Once I started school, football was a big deal at Hammond. That was what Friday night was all about. And once I hit high school, I never missed a game. That might have had a little more to do with the fact that I was a cheerleader and therefore required to attend. But that's neither here nor there.

First up for college football was Davidson, basically high school football at the collegiate level. No tailgating, no ESPN. You showed up on a Saturday afternoon, watched a little football, and then walked the 10 yards back to your dorm. Of course, sophomore year I never missed a game. Again, that might have had a lot to do with that pesky cheerleading. Yeah- I was a collegiate cheerleader. Bring it on!

Then came the transfer to USC and the realization that football in the South truly is a phenomenon unto itself. The planning that went into the tailgating. Who was going to pick everyone up so that cars could be left on National Guard Armory Road to save spots the night before? Answer- me. In the Explorer. With coolers. And 12 people. I'm not kidding. What to wear. What to fix for tailgating. This was a new experience for me and I embraced it with open arms. My blood ranneth garnet!

Law school was a whole different experience. They always say you can never go back. And they weren't lying. I figured I'd either keep tailgating with my college friends or find a new group of friends for tailgating. Neither happened. Too many law school friends couldn't have given two craps about USC football (or any college football for that matter). And the college friends had moved on to new tailgating adventures. So slowly, I went to less and less games. Still tried to hit a few each year, but not every one.

Then I graduated. And all of a sudden, I didn't have free tickets waiting for me each season. My parents tried to explain, in vain, that none of my tickets had ever truly been free. My opinion was that if I didn't have to shell out my money, it was free to me! But now that it came down to spending my hard earned money on season tickets or new shoes, shoes were going to win out every time.

The further removed I have become from being an active football attendee, the more blase I become about college football in general. I'll watch USC if they are on TV. I'll watch Clemson if they are on TV. While my family still likes to call me each year and pick on me when Clemson beats Carolina (don't hate- you all know it's true), I care less and less each year. Slowly, I am becoming Switzerland. And I think I like it that way.

I'm feeling very ShopTarty!!

2009-09-03T14:38:00.001-07:00

Today was a very ShopTart-esque day for me. The only thing missing are going to be the accompanying photos!

I started by having lunch with my friend Nancy. The one whose wedding I was in just a few short weeks ago. Nancy and her husband live in Myrtle Beach. I know, there are actually people who LIVE in Myrtle Beach. And they are cool people! We hit up a place neither of us had ever tried before, Bistro 217. It came recommended and I'd seen the menu, so I figured why not try it out. Why not indeed! It was delish! One of the specials was a beef bourguignon, something Julia Childs is known for. I found that quite odd as I had JUST finished reading Julie and Julia (where it is mentioned numerous times) and read an article about the fact that Julia Childs' cookbook is currently at the top of the best seller list (where it is mentioned again). Anyway, Nancy and I both had the chicken sandwich special. Grilled chicken topped with portobello mushrooms and melted Brie. In case you didn't know, I am a sucker for Brie (or a whore for Brie as I told Nancy at lunch). It came with a very nice salad and sweet potato fries. Heaven, I'm in heaven. For dessert, we split the white chocolate bread pudding. On second thought, maybe I should have just gotten that for lunch! It was all very tasty and very "ladies who lunch." I will definitely be a repeat customer. Anyway, next thing we know, we've been there for nearly two hours and someone needs to get back to work. That someone was not me!

Nancy headed back to work and I hopped back in the Solora, top down, to make the 2 minute drive back to Litchfield. Solora, I've missed you. I stop at Peddlers' Porch (or whatever the name of that shoe store is) to grab some shoes for my little grandmother, Dove. She's got the world's narrowest foot and very few places sell shoes that fit her. Not only did Peddlers have some, but they were in the middle of a 75% off sale. So of course, I had to nose around for myself. At first glance, I see nothing of interest. A LOT of VanEli old lady shoes, but nothing that screams Jane- buy me! Wear me! Love me!! Then imagine my delight when I spot the Pucci wedges, the Marc Jacobs gold lame wedges, the Lily Pulitzer gold evening sandals. Sadly, none of them fit me. So while my wallet thanked me (after the brutal thrashing it got outleting (still a word people)), my heart was sad. No new shoes. But a darn good lunch! So anyone in the area, ignore Peddlers Porch but head straight to Bistro 217. As Julia would say, Bon Appetit!!

Coincidence? Or foreshadowing?

2009-09-02T05:22:00.000-07:00

So last night Pops and I went to dinner Island Cafe and Deli. It's no Frank's, but our family likes it. The food is good and the nearby ducks like to join you for dinner. So anyway, Pops and I are sitting there, just eating away, and 2 people walk up. The man is slightly older (I'd say in his late 60's) and the woman is quite a bit younger. Pops says Second wife or daughter? I quickly respond Has to be second wife. Even though she was definitely younger, she was too well dressed. You could tell she still cared what he thought about how she looked. Then it hit me. Dear lord- people are thinking the same thing about me and Pops! Ew- gross. And sadly, story of my life.

I moved out of my apartment right before starting law school. I left my two roommates there and they found a girl to take my room. So moving day meant that I was moving out as she was moving in. A little confusing perhaps, but whatever works. At one point, she and I ended up on the elevator together. I had just met her that day, so we didn't really have a lot to talk about. Her first comment to me was It's so sweet that your boyfriend is helping you move today. I really appreciate mine for helping me. Did I mention that I didn't have a boyfriend at the time? I didn't. Oops- my bad. Who was helping me move you might ask. That'd be Pops. Yep- this little 21 year old girl thought that my little 21 year old self was dating a 51 year old man. That either says something about me or about me. Gross gross and gross. And perhaps the underlying reason why I subconsciously go for younger men.....

Working at the car-wash

2009-09-01T14:31:00.000-07:00

Today I went outleting (yes, that's a word). I love to outlet shop. I can do some SERIOUS damage in 2 hours. I'm not even going to tell you what kind of damage I did today. Suffice it to say, I've got some great stuff for work this fall!

Anyway, I was driving back to Litchfield. Pops had asked me to get the car a bath on the way back (after our muddin' experience). So I spotted a car-wash off to the right. It was no Constan, but anything in a pinch. So I paid my $6 and drove into the machine. As I pulled out I realized that Mom's antenna with Minnie Mouse on it had been pulled off. I had to run back through the car-wash and get Minnie. Yep- you read that correctly. I RAN through the car-wash. And damned if the car-wash hadn't actually broken Minnie. I killed Minnie! And got two baths for the price of one!

Ridin along in my automobile. My dad beside me at the wheel.

2009-08-31T15:02:00.000-07:00

This year's family vacation is missing a big part. That would be the whole family. Pops and I headed on down to Litchfield WITHOUT Mom! Why? Because the parentals' cat is still with us. Not that I'm complaining. She really is the sweetest cat on the planet. But even the vet tech is confused that she is still trotting around the house like her toxin levels aren't enough to kill a person, let alone a 5.5 pound cat! She's a survivor, that one. Should have known it when we found her. But anyway, Mom just couldn't leave her alone yet.

So Pops and I hop in the Highlander to make the trek to the coast. To be honest, I wasn't all that excited about alone time with Pops. Probably having something to do with the fact that the last time we had alone time, it got kind of heated. Because what he says/does/believes is a little different that what I say/do/believe. So I try to keep him in the dark as much as possible. All you only child who are girls, you know what I'm talking about. It's beyond him to try to understand the difference. And it's beyond me to try to explain it....

But back to the southern trek. We aren't alone in the Highlander. With us- the Garmin.

He has a few names. Jack (if he's American), Lee (Australian), or my favorite Daniel (the Brit). We of course know the way to the beach, but decide it will be fun to let Daniel direct us and then "re-call-cu-late" (as he calls it). Mom is from Lake City, so she likes to brag that she knows all these back roads. Back roads that Daniel sent us down. The best part though is that Danny seems to know about roads I didn't even know existed! We were driving down 378 when Pops realized we'd be coming into Litchfield from the north. Does it really matter? Why yes it does. Glad you asked. Pops wanted to stop at some golf course that was south of Pawleys. Daniel- a little help here. Why sure- just turn left on Miles Road. And from there, put on your muddin' gear because we didn't drive on a paved road for the next 6 miles!! Awesome! And of course, Danny was right. We ended up on Indiantown Road (or as one street sign said Idiantown), exactly where we wanted to be.

As for the drive, well, books can distract me so well that I can pretty much ignore anyone. Even when the book was about a group of housewives who became phone sex operators in order to get rid of some debts. Oops- bad choice with Pops sitting within spitting distance!

Memories- all alone in the moonlight....

2009-08-30T16:01:00.001-07:00

Recently, I've been doing a lot of looking back. Rehashing old memories. Both good ones and bad ones. I think it's because of the parentals' cat. When the cat you found 16 years ago is dying of kidney failure, it tends to make you look back. I remember finding Toe (she's polydactyl, meaning she has an extra toe that makes her little front paws look like mittens). She and her twin sister were found by me and my BBSHS (that'd be best friend since high school). They were the cutest freaking things ever. Her sister died a few years ago. Toe has missed her ever since. And now the vet has said, what with the tumors and the kidney failure, it's just a matter of time.

So then I started looking through old photo albums. You know, from back when people took pictures with something called film? High school. College. Law school. I started looking at them all. Then I found them. Videotapes. Yep- those old school things from before DVDs. But after Beta. The first one I watched was from the summer of 1998. The summer before my senior year of college. 4 college friends/fellow Young Life leaders and I worked at Windy Gap for a month on summer staff. For those of you who have never been to or heard of Windy Gap, it is in the mountains of North Carolina. And despite the fact that I haven't been there in YEARS, it might still be one of my most favorite places on the planet.

One of the guys on summer staff was the videographer. So one month of my life is captured on a 15 minute videotape. While a lot of my memories didn't make it to the video (I guess Jud didn't feel like following only me around for a month would be all that exciting), it's still kind of fun to see all those people who were so important to me that summer. And wonder how they are. What they are doing. If they ever pull out that video and smile.

The other video wasn't even remotely professional. It was from the summer of 2000. The summer after my first year of law school. And all we did was mess around. It's just us and our guy friends, talking and laughing and eating and being silly. I looked at my 22 year old self and sometimes wish I could go back. Back to when everything was so much simpler. I look at the girl I was then and really do wish I could live my life all over again. If given the choice, would you live any part of your life over again? And would you live it the same way? While I can honestly say that I might say some things a little differently, I honestly don't think I would DO anything differently. Every mistake, misstep and achievement I've had have led me to the woman I am today. While not everyone might like the woman I am, guess what. YOU don't have to. I do. And I do.

Life, love and passings

2009-08-26T16:12:00.001-07:00

I don't plan on using this blog to post about my policital views. But suffice it to say, I am a Republican. Kind of a liberal one, but a Republican nonetheless. Either party viewpoint you have though, it was still sad to hear about Ted Kennedy losing his battle with brain cancer. It seems like there have been a lot of "celebrity" deaths lately. Farrah, MJ, Billy Mays, Ed McMahon. I know people die every day. Looking at the paper can tell you that much. But I don't know most of those people. Not that I knew any of those celebrities either. But I felt like I did. At least their public personas.

It's never easy to face the death of a loved one. It's something that I think about and worry about all the time because of my dad. Until my third year of law school, I was one of the few 24 year olds I knew who still had all 4 grands still alive. March of my third year, my mom's dad passed away. He was only in the hospital for a few weeks. I remember going to visit him the weekend before he died. I remember him telling me that he loved me. But most of all, I remember the AMAZING man he was. Generous to a fault, never knew an enemy, Bubba could talk to a brick wall and get its life story! Then, two months later, right during the middle of Bridge the Crap, my dad's mom died. She, on the other hand, had gone into advanced stages of dementia about a year prior to passing away. She didn't remember any of us by that point. But I do remember the last visit I had with her, when she still knew me. The nurse asked if Grammy knew who I was. She told the nurse I was her sweet, sweet girl. Something she'd always called me. I couldn't ever go to see her again. It was just too hard, which I know was very selfish of me. But I remember her for the spitfire she was. Opinionated, brilliant, she was definitely a woman to whom I would be proud to be compared. Two Marchs later, my dad's dad passed away. Too put it bluntly, he died of a broken heart. Once my grandmother passed away, Grampa just didn't have the heart to go on without her. She was the love of his life, the 10 years older than him woman who stole his heart over 50 years earlier. Grampa was my most romantic of the grands. He wrote his wife's name with a heart over the I, so in love was he. So within two short years, I went to the funerals of 3 grands. And each one was difficult.

Thinking about each of my grands who has passed away, I like to think there is a little piece of each of them that can be found in me. While I might not talk to a brick wall, I will talk to darn near anyone and definitely share a lot. Just like Bubba. I am BEYOND opinionated. And love a compliment. Just like Grammy. And I am completely the romantic that Grampa was. I wonder how much of them in me is genetics and how much is watching and admiring them.

It's been interesting to see how each grand dealt with the loss of their spouse. Dove, although she misses her husband of over 50 years dearly, is still keeping herself busy 7 years later. Grampa just couldn't do it. I've always thought that men really couldn't make it without women, especially when that woman is/was the love of their life. If they are young enough, they will remarry. They have to. Women can somehow keep going. Does that mean women really do need men like fish need bicycles? And that men need us more than even they want to admit?

Law, order and suits

2009-08-25T17:17:00.001-07:00

I don't know if it's because I am a lawyer, but I've very picky on what lawyer shows I will watch on TV. I don't mind cop shows- I really like Cold Case, The Mentalist, and Psych. I can handle Law & Order, but only the original. That might be more for sentimental reasons though. My dad and I used to watch it a lot. And I used to date a cop, so someone once commented that we were our own episode of L&O! Which was kind of funny to me. I'm a very big fan of pro-prosecution shows though. I'm sure that has NOTHING to do with being a prosecutor for over 5 years. Or having a dad who was a prosecutor for 30 years. NOTHING at all! Oddly enough though, I kind of dig on Raising the Bar, which is not really a pro-prosecution show. But my all-time favorite lawyer show was Ally McBeal. I know, not even remotely realistic. But great all the same.

But one thing is a common thread for me. I do NOT approve of female lawyers wearing pants suits in trial. And that is something that holds true in real life. I'm very much a believer that women are just as smart and just as good as men at darn near everything. I don't think it should be a rule that women have to wear skirt suits in trial (although there was a judge who used to hold women in contempt if they didn't wear skirts in his courtroom). But for some reason, it just feels right to be in a skirt for trial. I feel more powerful in it. I feel more ladylike in it. Does that seem like the two don't mix? But I do feel it appeals to the jurors and the judge. Despite the fact that I'm not in trial anymore, I do appear in federal court, in front of a federal judge, at least twice a month. And I still wear skirt suits in "big court." Never for meetings of creditors though. Sorry trustees- y'all don't get the benefit of seeing my legs!

Did you know that men who kiss their wives every morning also live longer?

2009-08-24T11:55:00.000-07:00

So I was reading MSN today, as I usually do each day. And one of the articles was about love being unhealthy and toxic. Being the avid reader I am, I clicked on it. How surprising to immediately start reading about our esteemed Gov and his estranged wife. The focus of the article was about how affairs can be bad for your health, but that love can actually do wonders for you. Here's what a Men's Health article had to say about why love (and marriage) is good. So all you wives (and husbands) pay attention!

1. Married men earn more money than single men. I wonder if that's the same for women? Somehow, I feel like a single woman could earn more, just by being single....

2. Married people (esp men) get promoted faster than singles.

3. You are 4 times as likely to be a victim of a violent crime if you are single. I have a feeling those stats might vary depending on the crime and your marital status however.

4. Married men have more sex. The article doesn't say that all that sex is with their wives though....

5. Never-married and divorced men have a higher mortality rate than married men, at least as far as cancer goes. So yay for my dad! He's gonna be fine.

6. Over an 8 year period, UCLA found that single people, even in good health, were 88% more likely to die. Now, they don't really specify the age of these singletons. I'd be curious if they were talking about oldies or youngins.

Other studies have shown that if a man gets divorced and doesn't remarry, there’s a 40% chance he’ll die before age 65. If he never gets a divorce, there's only a 10% chance he'll die before 65. Another showed that ending a marriage can increase a man's risk of dying of cardiovascular disease by as much as 40%.

Either way, all of this is pretty scary stuff. But simultaneously fascinating. Who would have thought that marriage really is good for you?! At least, good for your health. So all you long-time lovers out there- here's to your health!!

If I was a celebrity, it's adios reality.....

2009-08-23T09:00:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't know me all that well, I am OBSESSED with celebrity gossip. I've been called a walking People magazine before. I don't lie. It's kind of sad, I know. But people know who to call when they want to know who Cameron Diaz is dating or the names of Brangelina's kids. I know these things. It's Keanu Reeves. And Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh, Vivian and Knox. That's by age, not appearance into the family. Yep- I know these things.

Because I'm obsessed with celebs, I'm also moderately obsessed with celeb kids. I think that Suri Cruise looks too much like Katie Holmes and Chris Klein for her to be Tom's baby. That coupled with the fact that Tom and Nicole had to adopt because allegedly Tom couldn't get her pregnant. I find it astonishing that celebs don't seem to control their kids. I wonder why they name their kids horrid names like Apple, Suri, Pilot Inspektor (that'd be Jason Lee for those of you who didn't know that one).

But what I find so sad is when two pretty celebs have unfortunate looking children. Case in point- Rumor Willis. Demi Moore- one of the prettiest women around. She looks great and always has. Bruce Willis- kind of sexy, in a baldheaded way. Not everyone might agree with me, but I find him attractive. Yet poor Rumor is ouch.... Not good. And she's not the only one. Wouldn't you hate it if your parents were gorgeous and you looked like a troll? I know I would.

Music makes the people come together

2009-08-22T16:16:00.000-07:00

Pretty much all I listen to in my car is my iPod. Yes, my car is fancy enough to have XM/Sirius Radio. And no, it's currently not being sprung for in my car payment (despite the fact that I'd really appreciate the navigation....) But I don't make those decisions and that's a whole other issue!

Anyway, I absolutely LOVE to sing while I drive. Pretty much anything will keep me happy, and my iPod reflects that. I've got everything- from rap, to country, to showtunes. I've been known to dance while I sing and drive as well. Don't worry- at least one hand (or knee) is always on the wheel!!

I keep my iPod on one of two things. Either I'm playing my list of current favorites songs (which is about 100 or so) or I have it on shuffle. Shuffle is my favorite thing to do because, let's face it, with well over 6000 songs, I've forgotten half of what I have on there. So it's frequently quite a surprise to hear random songs on the iPod. I mean, REALLY random stuff. Especially thanks to Starbucks free iTunes downloads. Those songs are wicked strange. Yes- I just said wicked. Like I'm from Boston. Don't worry- it's happened before. I blame my Yankee daddy (even though he doesn't say crap like that). Or my love for New Kids and their Bostonian accents.

But one thing I've noticed that I never noticed before. My iPod has a hella lot of songs about love, heartbreak and the like. Seriously. Do people write songs about anything else? I mean, OTHER than country musicians (who write about little else)? Just wondering. Thank goodness for rap artists. They aren't really down with love songs. Booty songs, yes. And those are always a good time (at least for a listen!)

Jane's Secret.....

2009-08-20T07:36:00.000-07:00

As a bankruptcy attorney, I spend all day, ever day, talking about debts and creditors. What's really funny is that I don't personally have a lot of debts OR creditors. Maybe it's because the parentals raised me that if you can't pay for it immediately, you can't really pay for it. Or because I was simply blessed not to have to incur mountains of student loans. Either way, I am debt-free. Except where Victoria's Secret is concerned. That's Jane's Secret. I'm a VS-aholic!! I have a platinum card from them. Yep- you heard right. PLATINUM! That means I have the biggest line of credit they will extend and I rack it up all the time!

I know what most of you are probably thinking. How much lingerie does one single gal need? The answer- not as much as you think I'm buying! The majority of my bathing suits come from VS. Half of my work clothes come from VS. When in doubt about something I'm wearing, it's either Target or VS. I'm not kidding. However, I have been known to indulge in the occasional lingerie purchase. A few years ago, I read a story about a woman whose good friend had died. This woman went over to the friend's house to help the husband go through her belongings and found quite a few beautiful things. China, lingerie, dresses. All of it being saved for "something special." So I started thinking, why should I wait for some special reason? What if that special reason never happens? So I occasionally buy myself summin purdy to wear and feel quite special curled up in my bed with my cat. She thinks I'm beautiful, no matter what!

Bruise is defined as the extravasation of blood in the tissues as a result of blunt force impact to the body.

2009-08-17T07:11:00.000-07:00

I have always bruised easily. Like a ripe peach one might say (if one is a little weird and creepy). Unfortunately, while I bruise easily, I don't bruise immediately. Which means that I'll run into something, comment that's going to leave a mark, and then wonder where the heck that bruise came from when it appears 2 days later. And for someone who's pretty coordinated, I run into stuff A LOT!

I had a friend in college who also ran into stuff a lot. Usually, we might not be complete sober while doing the running into, but either way, it happened. She and her high school friends called this phenomenon of running into stuff and only days later having a bruise UPBs. Unidentified Party Bruises. To this day, I still use that terminology, even if I didn't get the bruise at a party (or while intoxicated)!

Anyway, most of my bruises go away within a few days/a week. I've had this one behind my knee that just has me baffled. I think I got it in Vegas. Which was over a month ago. Right after the Vegas trip, the thing was actually black. Now, it's just a slight off-color. But it really has me confused. I swear, I wish someone lived in my house, because I could SOO say I was being abused. My legs currently look like they've gone 9 rounds with Tyson. Okay, maybe not Tyson. After all, they are bruises, not bite-marks!

Love and marriage, love and marriage

2009-08-15T20:47:00.000-07:00

My friend Nancy got married this weekend. She was my law clerk back when I worked at the Solicitor's Office. I remember when she came back to work one Christmas break and told me she'd been dating a guy. And that guy was Louis, the man she just married this weekend!! Nancy asked me to be a reader at the wedding. I was thrilled to say yes. It meant I got to be involved with everything, but wear whatever dress I wanted!!!

The weekend began on Thursday with the Sip and See at Nancy's parents house. For those of you who don't know what a Sip and See is, it's where guests get to come "sip" some sort of tasty beverage and "see" all the gifts the happy couple has received thus far. The theme of the evening was CHAMPAGNE. Oh yeah- and looking at all of Nancy and Louis' great gifts. I had to ask if we got favors for coming to the event. If so, I kind of liked her Mottahedeh plates... Then we helped the maid of honor make Nancy's bouquet. Really, we just put bows in our hair and talked.

Next up was the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner on Friday. At the rehearsal dinner, the groom's parents went all out with the Clemson theme. There were Tiger Rags on each chair, embroidered with Nancy and Louis' names and wedding date. There were orange flowers everywhere. And the best part- the Clemson tiger showed up. He apparently knows how to dress for events, because he was wearing his best tuxedo. T shirt.

Everything about the evening was great. There was a super slide show about the couple. The toasts were great. All in all, a great rehearsal. Oh- did I mention the food? SOOOO tasty! B-b-que (with all 3 sauces), mac and cheese, grits, Moon-pie banana puddin. Delish!

Saturday was the busy day. First up, the bridesmaid luncheon at her aunt's house. I've decided that I would like Nancy's uncle to be my personal caterer. He made the most amazing chicken salad with lemon zest in it. Don't even think it sounds weird, people. It was one of the tastiest chicken salads I have ever eaten. And I LOVE me some chicken salad!!

I arrived at the church around 4:40ish. Just enough time to hang with the 'maids and Nancy while everyone was getting ready and enjoying mimosas. Yum. I read Genesis. About how God created woman out of man because man shouldn't be alone. Man needed a helper and woman was created for him. So that they could cling to each other and be one flesh. I know- I didn't read the LOVE passage. I really preferred the one I read. That Old Testament is good stuff. Next thing we knew, the couple were kissing and hello Mr. and Mrs. Cote!!

The reception was SOOO much fun. The band was the Men of Distinction. They are way too much fun. The fathers got up to perform a little Blues Brothers. The maids were the Supremes. The groomsmen- the Temptations. The bride was Tina Turner. And Louis got a 'fro to perform as James Brown! Everyone was dancing and singing all night long. The only snafu of the evening occurred when the horn players were laying on the dance floor performing and some woman decided that falling on top of the sax player would be a good idea. If only he hadn't just had neck surgery, it might not have been quite so bad...... But the food was delicious. And there was a complete open bar, which meant more champagne for Jane!! One of the best parts for me was signing the guest book. Because both Nancy and Louis went to Clemson for undergrad, their guest book was a book about Clemson. I was able to sign on the page about the old Tin Cans (Johnstone Dorm for those of you not in the know). That's where my uncle lived long ago when he attended Clemson, so I thought that was kind of cool that no one else signed that page before I got there. The couple left to us blowing bubbles at them (Bubbles, bubbles, my bubbles!). And the fun weekend was over. All in all, the groom looked handsome, the bride looked BEAUTIFUL, the 'maids dresses were great, and a fun time was had by all!

Congrats to the new Cotes! I'm so happy for y'all!!

Dream a little dream of me

2009-08-13T07:31:00.000-07:00

I have always had some of the world's strangest dreams. So strange, in fact, that my college roomie gave me a Dreamer's Dictionary and notebook to write them down and figure them out. I think I freaked her out when I told her that I'd had a dream that a friend of hers named Harvey came to visit us and ended up falling asleep on the foot of my bed. Why did that freak her out? Because her family used to have a dog named Harvey who slept on the foot of the bed. And she'd never told me about this dog!

Another time, I dreamt that I was a cartoon bunny rabbit in a musical. Yep- you read that correctly. And I'm not talking some Bugs Bunny type cartoon. I mean Dreamworks quality. We sang, we danced. We stole carrots from the evil King of the Hares. Don't ask. I have no idea where this comes from.

Then there was the dream about Richard Simmons. I was helping him lead a Sweatin' to the Oldies class. Complete with thong leotard, bike shorts, and those stupid thick socks with my Reebok hightops.

Or the time I dreamt there was a tiger loose in my grandmother's house in Lake City. Somehow, we got it trapped in one of the upstairs rooms and had to climb through ceiling tiles to get out of the room. My grandmother's house is like 100 years- there ARE no ceiling tiles in her house!

This morning, I awakened from another doozie. I was in the woods, with an ex. And we were being chased by a man with a gun who was trying to kill us. I don't know what we'd done, but clearly, it was something bad. Anyway, we are running and he's chasing and the next thing I know, I'm now alone in the woods. I keep running and eventually end up in a small town. I find some police officers who I hope will help me. One of them is a former co-worker from the Solicitor's Office. She left about 3 or 4 years ago. I'm trying to get help, but I can't talk because I'm so severely dehydrated. Finally, they realize what's wrong and get me some water from the Taco Bell. As I'm basically pouring water down my throat, I wake up. And I've been thirsty all morning. Wonder what kind of thirst I'm REALLY trying to quench?!

Size 4 you say? Inconceivable!!

2009-08-12T11:55:00.000-07:00

This morning, I was flipping through my closet for a black skirt. I've got about 6 of them, so I always have options. I grabbed one that hasn't fit in YEARS. It's a great skirt- Banana Republic, fishtail skirt, size 4. I think to myself what harm can it do to try the thing on? Imagine my complete shock when it actually fits! And is a little big on me! I haven't been a size 4 in years! Happy day, happy day! But it got me thinking about my past ventures in weight loss.

A few years ago, I joined Weight Watchers. I'm sure every single one of you who reads my blog just went "Are you nuts?! You? Weight Watchers?" Let me explain. I'd just gotten out of a very bad relationship and gained about 10 pounds before the break-up because it was just way too much drama. Long distance, didn't see each other for 6 months because he was cheating on me, yadda yadda. Anyway, I noticed that none of my clothes were fitting anymore and that made me not happy. I spend WAY too much on clothes to not be able to wear them. So off to WW I went. I didn't really go for the meetings. I'm not big on the "rah rah you can do it" aspect of weight loss. I went for the info and the weekly weigh-in. Dun dun dun.

Week one: I explain to the WW guru that I'm only there to lose about 10 pounds. Because I've realized that I don't want to wake up one day and need to lose 100. She applauds my realization that any little bit of weight that makes me unhappy is weight I need to lose. The other women give me evil glares. I get all of my info about how many points I can eat each day and then hop on the scale. This can't possibly be right. I've never weighed this much in my life! 10 pounds my butt- I need to lose 15! And so began my quite successful foray into WW. I learned all sorts of tricks for snacking throughout the day. I still would have a drink if I felt the urge. I was working out. And once I hit my goal weight, peace out WW!!

I've realized that I have always been a fan of trying (or thinking about trying) the fad diet. I tried that stupid Lemonade Diet/Cleanse that Beyonce did. I made it 2 days and promptly threw up from the cayenne pepper concoction I had to drink on a daily basis. I'll read a book about a diet and think I could do that. But I don't. The only part of dieting I actually like is being able to fit into clothes I haven't worn in years. The best diet I've ever been on though is the one that happens naturally. You know, when your appetite just fades away. I know I'm not the only one here. We've all had it happen. For whatever reason. So that size 4 skirt fitting PERFECTLY might be a silly reason to be happy, but it is what it is. Sometimes it's the little things.

"Music hath charms to soothe a savage breast, to soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak." William Congreve

2009-08-10T12:39:00.000-07:00

I've always been musical. I would never actually call myself a musician by ANY stretch of the imagination. But I grew up dancing, playing the piano and singing constantly. Much to my chagrin, I was NOT voted Most Talented for my Senior Superlative. Still a little put out about that, but that's a whole other issue. As is my bitterness about not being voted Miss Hammond my senior year. Or co-captain of the cheerleading squad my senior year. Or the fact that they decided to do away with someone singing at graduation my senior year. Dang- I used to think senior year was pretty good. Looking back, my senior year sucked!

But back to music. I spent all 4 years of high school taking voice lessons at Columbia College. I sang show tunes, I sang hymns, I sang Italian arias. And I loved every minute of it. I knew I didn't have the voice to make a career out of it. I harbored no delusions of grandeur. But I knew that I could sing. And I did so every chance I got. Still do. I sing in the shower, I sing in the car, I sing with my mom, I sing Hannah Montana with my little cousin. Heck, I make sure to sing happy birthday to my friends, making up new songs for them as I go. One of my best friends and I have ALWAYS sung with (and sometimes at) each other.

But music goes deeper than that for me. I've always wished that I could also (to steal a line from the fabulous Mr. Manilow) write the songs that make the whole world sing. I've always dabbled in poetry. Writing when the mood strikes. But to be able to set it to music as well would be amazing. Because almost every day I find a song that truly speaks to me in that moment. I've got nearly 7000 songs on my iPod. Some of them are from my own CDs, some are free downloads from Starbucks, some are songs I've simply heard a verse of and decided I must own. But it's amazing what can be found when you are nosing around your own musical tastes. Lately, I've had one particular song on repeat. It's a song by a girl named Lucy Woodward. And it just makes me feel like I'm not the only one who feels like I feel. That right there is why I would love to write music. Because somewhere out there, there's a person who feels exactly the same way I do at exactly this moment. And I'd love to be there for them.

Mask- it's not just a Cher movie you know....

2009-08-08T12:58:00.000-07:00

This morning, I was getting ready and watching Full House. Please, don't judge. I love me some Uncle Jesse!! Anyway, a commercial came on for the movie "A Cinderella Story." And it made me start thinking about the baffling concept of masks in movies/TV shows. Why is it that a simple mask over the eyes or glasses all of a sudden makes you unrecognizable to people who have known you for years?! Like Superman/Clark Kent. Seriously, Lois Lane didn't recognize him?! Even I have a hard time suspending my disbelief for that.

But of course, it made me think even deeper about what it was truly saying. Do we all wear masks? I think so. We definitely don't like to show everyone our true selves. We don't like for people to see our weaknesses, what defines us. But what else really defines the masks we wear? Is it when we tell people what they want to hear, even though it's not really the truth? Is it when we don't allow someone in, even though they are desperate to share our lives? Do we put on a mask only when we feel like the other person has one? Sometimes the masks we wear are good and sometimes they aren't. And amazingly, even if we're wearing a bad mask, people can't see it. Guess it just goes to show that we see what we want to see.

If you can't say something nice, come sit next to me.....

2009-08-07T11:33:00.001-07:00

You know how Mama always said to be careful what you say about people, because SOMEONE could be listening? Or your old boss always said to be careful, because THEY are out to get you? Oh, that second one was just me. My bad.

Anyway, I've always wondered who SOMEONE and THEY are. And last night, I discovered that SOMEONE and THEY are people you already know. I was grabbing dinner and drinks with a friend, a fellow female attorney. We got to talking about work. And I mentioned one of the local judges, who has a reputation for being, well, difficult. Not everyone likes him (although darn near everyone respects him). I, on the other hand, think he is fabulous!!! Some of my most memorable experiences in the courtroom were in front of him. Not to mention he sentenced a guy to a whooping 18 years in my 2nd ever trial!! But I digress. Anyway, I ask my friend if she's ever appeared in front of him and how much I like him. About an hour later, we have made a location switch to another bar. I notice a girl I know who had been sitting at the table next to us at location number 1. She comes up to say hi and, color me floored, she is this judge's NIECE!! I'd have been mortified if she'd heard me say something horrible about him. Thank goodness I really do like and respect the man (and his funny sense of humor).

So lesson learned, Mom and former boss. Lesson learned. If you can't say something nice, say nothing. And they really are out to get you!

Pet peeve #1

2009-08-05T13:28:00.001-07:00

I've got a lot of pet peeves. A lot of them. And I'm just going to go ahead and put my biggest one out there. I hate other drivers. There we go- I've said it. Why do I hate other drivers? Because they aren't me! I'm more than happy to acknowledge that I am not the world's best driver. But dang it- everyone else is SO much worse. Case in point. Today, I swing by the parentals' house to check on their animals. The cat's doing well and is happy to see me. The fish couldn't care less. They aren't even interested in the food. Stupid fish. I leave and head off to work. One end of the parentals' street is a swampy area. I am behind a small SUV which, without any warning whatsoever, slows to a crawl and pulls off the side of the road. Would it kill you to give me a little heads up? It would. Oh, okay. My bad. The very next street, some other driver does the exact same thing. Turns into a driveway with no turn signal. Did you know that cars now come standard with turn signals? You didn't? Okay- I'm letting you know. Feel free to use it regularly in the future. Then, driving down Millwood, there's almost a wreck in front of me because someone just up and decides to pull out into traffic. I nearly get decked by an ambulance because the cars in front of me won't move. I swear, our highways would be a safer place if I were the only one driving. Of course, I'm not sure how the rest of you would get around. But that's not really my problem, is it?!

"Love" stories?!

2009-08-04T07:59:00.000-07:00

I love to tell stories about my life. I especially love to tell stories about my bad dating life. And every time I tell a story, people laugh hysterically and say "You should write that down." I also get a lot of "Holy crap- that really happens?!" Which made me start thinking. Now that I have a blog, I DO have a place to write down all these stories. So let's start with some of my favorites.

I'd been seeing a guy for a few months. It was long distance- like 8 hours long distance. But we were trying to make it work. We didn't see each other a lot, but we sure did burn up the phone lines. Anyway, things were starting to get a little off because neither one of us wanted to move. Kind of hard to continue a relationship when it's going nowhere. Literally. So I had already made plans to go up to visit him one weekend. Mid-week, I shoot him a text about weekend plans so I'll know what to pack. Hello- I'm a girl. I'm a "like to plan ahead and be prepared for every option with the appropriate outfit" girl. Next thing I know, I receive the following text. "I don't think you should come up this weekend. I don't have feeling 4 u." To be forever stated as "I don't have feelings number 4 letter u" by me. Yep- I just one-upped Carrie Bradshaw. Screw the Post-It. I got dumped via text speak!! He couldn't even spell it out or do it in a phone call!! Oddly enough, we remained friends (sometimes it's just better that way).

Another doozy is Fish Boy. About 5 years ago, I got set up with some guy. I don't even remember his name, but that's not really an important part of the story anyway. I don't really know much about him, so I decide I am NOT going to let him know where I live. Instead, we meet out for drinks one night at Gracie's (I miss that place!!) We have a great time. At the end of the night, he doesn't walk me to my car. Strange. But he's a West Coast boy. Clearly his mama didn't raise him right. We had such a fun time though, that I agreed to a second date. We again met out, this time at Mangia! Mangia! (I miss that place too!!) Again, a fun time was had by all. We actually shut down the restaurant. We walk outside, have the obligatory hug, and then he walks off to his car, leaving me to walk to the back of the restaurant alone. Not cool. I'm going down an alley. I could be raped. I could be killed. Stupid West Coast boy. But for some reason, I decided to give him another chance. This time, it was a movie and sushi. Because the movie theatre was conveniently located about 1/2 a mile from my house, I relented and let him pick me up. We head to Inakaya for sushi. We have fun. We laugh at people's inability to use chopsticks. I eat eel. We head back to my house and sit in his car, just talking. As I notice him leaning towards me, I think well, this IS date #3. I guess a kiss is in order. Next thing I know, he leans back from the kiss and this comes out of his mouth- Hmmmm- you taste like fish. Yep. Our first kiss and after feeding me sushi, he tells me I taste like fish. I immediately blacked out. I have no recollection of getting out of the car or into the house. And suffice it to say, I never heard from Fish Boy again.

There have been so many others. Break-ups while out of town for a wedding. The time I went to a hockey game for a date and came back out to discover that my date's car had been broken into. Luckily, I hadn't left anything in the car, so didn't affect me! The time I went to law school prom and came back out to discover that my date's car had been broken into. Luckily, my overnight bag in the back wasn't spotted, so didn't affect me! The Valentine's spent at Bubba and Buck's (a country line dancing bar, for those of you who didn't know Columbia back in the day). I'm sure there are countless others. And looking back, they still make me laugh!

Quotes

2009-08-03T14:31:00.000-07:00

I've always been a sucker for a great quote. I think it stems back to my freshman year of college. We used to post quotes up and down the hallway. Admittedly, the majority of them were quotes that we had said. But they were great nonetheless. My all-time favorites being "Boys are dumb" and "Don't be a wet-head." Man- I loved my freshman hallmates! Fun (and funnier) girls couldn't be found! Even others from college added fabulous quotes to my list. "What do you mean, why do I drink? I'm part Viking. All the Vikings did was drink, rape and pillage. At least I'm not raping and pillaging." (Thanks Matt!)

As I've grown older, I've found myself drawn to quotes with a little more substance. Quotes from famous people. Quotes from novels. Quotes from movies. Things like:

"Being successful in life is not what really matters. Being significant in life is the core root of what matters."

"Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction." Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"A friend is one soul, existing in two bodies." Socrates

"If someone says something bad about you, live so noone believes it."

"Regrets are mistakes that you don't learn from."

"When Christ said your faith could move mountains, He didn't mean it was as simple as saying 'presto-chango!' He meant that faith that moves mountains always carries a pick." S. Rickly Christian

"I'm from the South. Flirting is part of my heritage." Blanche Devereux (ok, maybe that's not of too much substance, but Blanche speaks the truth!)

And my new favorite "Love is as love does."

Really makes you think about things. It's like that Extreme song- "More Than Words." When people say they love you, is it just words to them? Or do they truly SHOW you how they feel? I feel like people throw the word "love" around too easily. You hurt my feelings. I didn't mean to- I LOVE you. You are so much fun! You too- I LOVE hanging out with you! I LOVE pizza. I LOVE watching TV. I LOVE YOU. So just an observation, don't say it if you don't truly mean it. Because pizza's feelings are going to be hurt when you decide you don't love it anymore or that you've decided you actually love sushi!

Ants in my pants (well, not literally)

2009-08-02T19:32:00.000-07:00

About 9 hours ago, I realized my cat (Lali) was milling around outside the kitchen, as though to tell me she was hungry. You know how kids have a potty dance to let you know they need to go? Well, my Lali-bug sometimes does the hungry prowl. Or so I thought. Off I go to the kitchen. I serve her food on a tray underneath a little table in my kitchen. The tray is currently not there, but that's a part of the story.

Anyway, I glance at her tray and see that there is quite a bit of food on it.

Odd. She usually only prowls when I forget to feed her on time. (I swear- I am a good mommy!!)

Then I notice something strange going on in my kitchen. There is a steady stream of ants going right under the cabinets and towards Lali's food tray! Not just towards it- they are on the freaking food!! My kitchen is just inside my front door, so I immediately looked in the foyer to see from where this stream of horrific-ness stemmed. Nope- they hadn't come from outside. Rather, the root of the problem was the inner door jam of my kitchen door. Next thing I know, I'm emptying out the tray of food, swatting at ants that have now made it to my countertop and closing the doors to the kitchen. Yeah, that's going to keep the ants in there alright. As I'm not big with the bugs, my first call is to the parentals. Who are conveniently in Chicago at the moment.

Mom- there are carpenter ants in my kitchen! (My immediate assumption because they were hanging out in my wooden door) Help! What do I do?

Well, are they big?

No.

Then they aren't carpenter ants. You probably need to get some sort of spray to kill them.

But where Mom? From some place like Wal-Mart? (I'm not kidding people. There's a reason why God created men and moms).

So off I go to Wal-Mart. In my undershirt and unwashed hair. Oddly enough, I got some glances. And I don't mean confused ones. Wal-Mart is a frightening place. I grab some ant killer and it's back to kick some ant butt. The spray down starts. Not an ant survives. Rivers of little dead ant bodies are running along my floor. Victory is mine!!

The downside is that I've moved the cat's food, I've still got the doors to the kitchen closed (again, like that's going to keep them in there), and I'm thoroughly convinced that ants are currently crawling all over my body. And Lali, bless her heart, is hiding out in the guest room!

The Shack

2009-08-02T07:22:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't know me, I am quite the avid reader. For those of you who do know me, I'm sure you aren't surprised by that statement. I always have a book in my purse. My library is extensive and there is no rhyme nor reason to it. I've got chick lit. Christian lit. Best sellers. Autobiographies. Hardbacks. Paperbacks. Thick books. Thin books. Books with great titles, but crappy plots. Books with crappy titles, but great plots. Even a few children's books thrown in for good measure. And I'm always looking for a new book to read.

Someone suggested a new book for me- "The Shack." So I bought it and it sat on my bookshelf for about 4 months. Finally, I picked it up. And began carrying it around in my purse for about a week. Eventually, I broke down and started reading it. Next thing I knew, I was underlining passages and dog-earring pages, something I've never done to a work of fiction. The main character Mack experiences a loss that can only be described as every parent's nightmare- the loss of a child. I have never experienced a loss to that degree. But we've all experienced things that deeply affected us. Those things can have long term effects on us. In both good ways and bad ways. But back to my reaction to this book.

What an amazing look at love, relationships, redemption, and God. I've never really felt so intrigued by a book. Not just because the plot was so fascinating. But because of my reaction to it. I don't care if you aren't a reader- you need to read this book! The author's way of describing things just made everything so, I don't even know how to explain it! Here's a little exerpt:

"Most birds were created to fly. Being grounded for them is a limitation within their abililty to fly, not the other way around....[Humans], on the other hand, were created to be loved. So for you to live as if you were unloved is a limitation, not the other way around....Living unloved is like clipping a bird's wings and removing its ability to fly. Not something [God] want[s] for you....pain has a way of clipping our wings and keeping us from being able to fly. And if it's left unresolved for very long, you can almost forget that you were ever created to fly in the first place." Wow- do we ever truly allow ourselves to be loved, fully knowing that it was the reason we were created?! Why do we then run away from love? When love stares us in the face, why do we feel that we aren't deserving or we simply can't appreciate it?

Or this observation, from God, about sin: "I don't need to punish people for sin. Sin is its own punishment, devouring you from the inside. It's not my purpose to punish it; it's my joy to cure it." Kind of takes away that image of a vengeful God, and replaces it with the image of a daddy God. One who doesn't want us to hurt. But knows that we sometimes have to.

One that really got to me was this one, from God- "just because I work incredible good out of unspeakable tragedies doesn't mean I orchestrate the tragedies. Don't ever assume that my using something means I caused it or that I needed it to accomplish my purposes. That will only lead you to false notions about me. Grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colors." Sometimes it's so hard to see why God would allow suffering and tragedies in our lives. Acknowledging that God simply is going to use whatever happens to us to show us His grace is such an interesting way to look at life.

But the most interesting was about male/female relationships. "From the first day we hid the woman within the man, so that at the right time we could remove her from within him. We didn't create man to live alone; she was purposed from the beginning. By taking her out of him, he birthed her in a sense. We created a circle of relationship, like our own, but for humans. She, out of him, and now all the males, including me, birthed through her, and all originating, or birthed, from God." I love that image, that woman was hidden within man so that he didn't need to be alone. God doesn't want us to be alone. No matter what difficulties we face, what tragedies confront us. We were not meant to be alone. Either physically or spiritually. God created in us a need for companionship. That need is two-fold. We need a physical companion, someone to walk with us hand-in-hand through all of what life has to offer. And we need a spiritually companion, a Papa (as the characters in the book refer to God) to walk with us hand-in-hand through all of what life has to offer. Both companions are there, for the good and the bad.

Even though I am constantly reading a new book, I really don't think I've read one that struck me to the extent that this one did. So please, read this book. Because Papa is especially fond of each of you. Always remember that. I know it's something that I will carry with me. God loves all of His children equally. And He is especially fond of me!

Day One

2009-08-01T19:33:00.000-07:00

Well, I realized that I'm apparently very behind in the world. While I still refuse to Tweet, I guess I might as well start blogging. Who knows- maybe something super exciting will happen to me soon and I will be THRILLED to share it somewhere other than FB.

To be honest, I never really thought I'd be a blogger. But I do enjoy writing. It really gets out a lot of my emotions (even if I decide not to make myself completely vulnerable here on the interweb). I also don't really mind talking about myself. So it seems like blogging is the perfect combination, huh?

I was out at a movie with some of my friends tonight. The Ugly Truth, btw. Very funny, but I wouldn't suggest seeing it with anyone you'd be embarassed to pull a Salt 'N' Pepa with. (That'd be talking about sex, for those of you who aren't up on your 90's music). Anyway, one of them commented that she had just started blogging. And she's not the only one. Two of her sister-in-laws blog. Girls I'm in Junior Leauge with blog. People I don't even know personally blog. And SO many others blog. So perhaps it was time to join the club.

The problem is, what to blog about? I'm not a celebrity. I'm not a crazy shopper. I'm not a foodie. I'm not a mom with funny kids (although my cat has some strange days). I'm just me. So I guess that's what I'll be talking about. Just me. "Not So Plain Jane" (as a college friend used to call me). Let's see if this blogging leads me to any epiphanies or if it simply just offers me an outlet during the sometimes craziness that is my life. We'll see....